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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of women marriage and other funny jokes |
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Top 100 Joke
These are supposedly actual classified ads that have appeared in various papers across the world. FOR SALE: LEE MAJORS (6 MILLION DOLLAR MAN) - $50 NORDIC TRACK $300 - HARDLY USED - CALL CHUBBIE at: BILL'S SEPTIC CLEANING - 'WE HAUL AMERICAN MADE PRODUCTS' SHAKESPEARE'S PIZZA - FREE CHOPSTICKS HUMMELS - LARGEST SELECTION EVER - 'IF IT'S IN STOCK, WE HAVE IT!' PRESIDENT'S CHOICE - COW MANURE - 2 33lb bags - $5 HARRISBURG POSTAL EMPLOYEES GUN CLUB GEORGIA PEACHES - CALIFORNIA GROWN - 89 cents lb. NICE PARACHUTE - NEVER OPENED - USED ONCE - SLIGHTLY STAINED
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Bumper Stickers - 5
If you cannot convince them, confuse them.
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Frog Joke
What do you call a girl with a frog in her hair ? Lily !
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Bumper Stickers - 7
Where Are We Going And Why Am I In This Handbasket?
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Telephone Joke
Mother: Why was the phone busy all night? Babysitter: The fire department put me on hold.
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Love and Marriage Joke
Another on that I have seen pulled is to have someone speak out at the time the minister asks, 'If anyone has good reason why these two should not be married, speak now or forever hold your peace. 'They had a pregnant lady stand up and say, 'Oh, never mind! I'll just call my lawyer!' It rattled the groom's mother so much that she fainted.
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Politics Humor
Hillary Clinton goes to her doctor for a physical, only to find outthat she's pregnant! She is furious. Here just became the senator ofNew York and this has happened to her. She gets Bill on the phone and immediately starts screaming: 'How could you have let this happen?With all that's going on right now, you go and get me pregnant! Howcould you??!!! I can't believe this! I just found out I am five weeks pregnant and it is all your fault!!! Your fault!!! Well, what haveyou got to say???'There is nothing but dead silence on the phone. She screamsagain, 'Did you hear me??!!' Finally she hears Bill's very, veryquiet voice. In a barely audible whisper, he says, 'Who is this?'
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Stupid Men
Why do men get married.
Because Mom won't put up with their shit anymore.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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