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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of weird wall clocks and other funny jokes |
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Music Joke
Conductor: Again from measure '5
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Funny School Kids Joke
What do you call the English Toad Prize giving cermony?The Brit Awarts!
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Horse Joke
How much money did the bronco have? Only a buck!
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Naughty Joke
Did you know Sex is a crime?Its a misdemeanor - The more I miss de meaner I get. .
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Kids Puns
If your child asks how Santa Claus gets into the house, just tell him he comes in through a large hole in daddy's wallet.
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Romance Joke
The doctor had just completed his examination of thegorgeous redhaired beauty. 'I would suggest to you, young lady, ' began the medic, as he regained som of his professional dignity, 'that you discontinue some of your running around. Stop drinking so much, cut down on your smoking, andabove all you will have to start eating properly andgetting to bed early. ' Then, as a pleasant afterthought, he added: 'Why nothave dinner with me tonight? I'll see to it that youhave the proper food and that you'll be in bed by 9:00!'
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Blonde Joke - 1
Did you hear about the blonde who put 'Sagittarius' at the bottom of application forms where it said 'Sign Here'.
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Easy to Remember Joke
Golf GenieA couple was golfing one day on a very, very exclusive golf course, lined with million dollar houses. On the third tee the husband said, 'Honey, be very careful when you drive the ball don't knock out any windows. It'll cost us a fortune to fix. 'The wife teed up and shacked it right through the window of the biggest house on the course. The husband cringed and said, 'I told you to watch out for the houses. Alright, let's go up there, apologize and see how much this is going to cost. 'They walked up, knocked on the door, and heard a voice say, 'Come on in. ' They opened the door and saw glass all over the floor and a broken bottle lying on its side in the foyer. A man on the couch said, 'Are you the people that broke my window?''Uh, yeah. Sorry about that. ' the husband replied. 'No, actually I want to thank you. I'm a genie that was trapped for a thousand years in that bottle. You've released me. I'm allowed to grant three wishes-I'll give you each one wish, and I'll keep the last one for myself. ''OK, great!' the husband said. ' I want a million dollars a year for the rest of my life. ' 'No problem-it's the least I could do. And you, what do you want?' the genie said, looking at the wife. 'I want a house in every country of the world, ' she said. 'Consider it done. ' the genie replied. 'And what's your wish, genie?', the husband said. 'Well, since I've been trapped in that bottle, I haven't had sex with a woman in a thousand years. My wish is to sleep with your wife. 'The husband looks at the wife and said, 'Well, we did get a lot of money and all those houses, honey. I guess I don't care. ' The genie took the wife upstairs and ravished her for two hours. After it was over, the genie rolled over, looked at the wife, and said, 'How old is your husband, anyway?' '35. ' she replied. 'And he still believes in genies?. . . . That's amazing!'
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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