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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of weird clocks and other funny jokes |
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Romance Joke
This fellow was screwing his best friend's wife when he suddenly stopped and sat on the edge of the bed, holding his head in his hands. 'What the hell is your problem?' the lady asked. 'I feel like a regular son of a bitch, getting my best friends pussy, ' the man moaned. The lady reached over and patted him on the back. 'Well, if that's all it is, you can stop worrying, ' she said. 'You're not getting his pussy. His pussy is five to six inches deeper. '
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History Joke
What did General Patton do on Thanksgiving? He gave tanks.
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Money Joke
Q:Why did the man put his money in the freezer? A:('He wanted cold hard cash!')
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Idiot and fool Joke
Did you hear about the dimwit who went to visit his girlfriend and found she didn't have very much on? He went back nine months later and she had a little moron.
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Law Joke
Three paramedics were boasting about improvements in their respective ambulance team's response times.
'Since we installed our new satellite navigation system,' bragged the first one, 'we cut our emergency response time by ten percent. '
The other paramedics nodded in approval. 'Not bad,' the second paramedic commented. 'But by using a computer model of traffic patterns, we've cut our average ERT by 20 percent. '
Again, the other team members gave their congratulations, until the third paramedic said, 'That's nothing! Since our ambulance driver passed the bar exam, we've cut our emergency response time in half!'
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Spelling Joke
Please, ma'am! How do you spell ichael? The teacher was rather bewildered. 'Don't you mean Michael?' she asked. 'No, ma'am. I've written the 'M' already. '
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Bumper Stickers - 5
I've given up trying to escape from reality; they always find me anyway.
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Joke for Holidays
A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He sidles up to the bar and announces:'I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw. '
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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