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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of weird bicycle game and other funny jokes |
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Marriage Joke
After shopping for most of the day, a couple returns to find their car has been stolen. They go to the police station to make a full report. Then, a detective drives them back to the parking lot to see if any evidence can be found at the scene of the crime. To their amazement, the car has been returned. There is an envelope on the windshield with a note of apology and two tickets to a music concert. The note reads, 'I apologize for taking your car, but my wife was having a baby and I had to hot-wire your ignition to rush her to the hospital. Please forgive the inconvenience. Here are two tickets for tonight's concert of Garth Brooks, the country-and-western music star. ' Their faith in humanity restored, the couple attend the concert and return home late. They find their house has been robbed. Valuable goods have been taken from thoughout the house, from basement to attic. And, there is a note on the door reading, 'Well, you still have your car. I have to put my newly born kid through college somehow, don't I?'
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Computer Joke
Q: What's the difference between a car salesman and a computer salesman? A: The car salesman can probably drive!
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Father Joke
Ole's neighbor Sven had a boy, Sven Junior, who came home one day and asked, 'Papa, I have da biggest feet in da third grade. Is dat becoss I'm Norvegian?'
'No,' said Sven, 'It's because you're NINETEEN. '
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Cannibal Joke
What happened to the entertainer who did a show for the cannibals ? He went down really well !
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Worlds Best Joke
What is a country song played backwards?Your wife gets back with you, your dog comes back to life, your carstarts, you get your job back and life is great.
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Lawyer Joke
The Godfather, accompanied by his attorney, walked into a room to meet with his accountant. The Godfather asked the accountant, 'Where's the three million bucks you embezzled from me?'The accountant didn't answer. The Godfather asked again, 'Where's the three million bucks you embezzled from me?'The attorney interrupted, 'Sir, the man is a deaf-mute and cannot understand you, but I can interpret for you. 'The Godfather said, 'Well, ask him where the @#!* money is. 'The attorney, using sign language, asked the accountant where the three million dollars was. The accountant signed back, 'I don't know what you're talking about. 'The attorney interpreted to the Godfather, 'He doesn't know what you're talking about. 'The Godfather pulled out a pistol, put it to the temple of the accountant, cocked the trigger and said, 'Ask him again where the @#!* money is!'The attorney signed to the accountant, 'He wants to know where it is!'The accountant signed back, 'Okay! Okay! The money's hidden in a suitcase behind the shed in my backyard!'The Godfather asked, 'Well, what did he say?'The attorney interpreted to the Godfather, 'He said that you don't have the guts to pull the trigger. '
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Medical Joke
This male prostitute contracted leprosy. He did okay for a while, but then his business dropped off.
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Bumper Stickers - 4
I get enough exercise just pushing my luck!
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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