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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of weird anniversary present and other funny jokes |
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Car and train Joke
Q: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive lawfully? A: I would be forced to drive unlawfully.
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Old age Joke
An 80 year old couple were having problems remembering things, so they decided to go to their doctor to get checked out to make sure nothing was wrong with them. When they arrived at the doctor's, they explained to the doctor about the problems they were having with their memory. After checking the couple out, the doctor tells them that they were physically okay but might want to start writing things down and make notes to help them remember things. The couple thanked the doctor and left. Later that night while watching TV, the old man got up from his chair and his wife asks, 'Where are you going?' He replies, 'To the kitchen. ' She asks, 'Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?' He replies, 'Sure. ' She then asks him, 'Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?' He says, 'No, I can remember that. ' She then says, 'Well, I also would like some strawberries on top. You had better write that down cause I know you'll forget that. ' He says, 'I can remember that, you want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries. ' She replies, 'Well, I also would like whip cream on top. I know you will forget that so you better write it down. ' With irritation in his voice, he says, 'I don't need to write that down, I can remember that. ' He then fumes into the kitchen. After about 20 minutes he returns from the kitchen and hands her a plate of bacon and eggs. She stares at the plate for a moment and says, 'You forgot my toast. '
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Knock Knock Joke - 1
Knock Knock Who's there ! Adam ! Adam who ? Adam up and tell me the total !
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Halloween Joke
What do witches eat at Halloween? Spook-etti, Halloweenies, Devil's food cake and Boo-berry pie.
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Doctor and nurse Joke
Doctor, are you sure I'm suffering from pneumonia? I've heared once about a doctor treating someone with pneumonia and finally he died of typhus. 'Don't worry, it won't happen to me. If I treat someone with pneumonia he will die of pneumonia. '
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Short Joke
Q: Did you hear about the blonde lesbian?A: She kept having affairs with men!
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Joke Online
Pfizer Corp (NYSE PFE) is making the announcement today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola Bottling Group (NYSE PBG) as a power beverage, suitable for use as-is, or a mixer, under the name 'Mount and Do. 'Pepsi's proposed ad campaign suggests:'It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one. '
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Computer Joke
Would you like to buy a second-hand computer? I'm afraid not. I'm only able to type with one hand as it is.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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