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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of weird al downloads and other funny jokes |
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Heaven and hell Joke
A Director arrives below and is met by Satan who shows him around. Turns out that Hell is a gigantic movie studio with the latest and best equipment, stages, great actors, etc. Director thinks its great and asks Satan what heaven is like if hell is this good. Satan says heaven is exactly like this, a movie studio. The Director is confused. 'Then what's the difference, ' he asks. Satan smiles. 'Well, in heaven they actually *make* movies. '
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Funny Kids Joke
What cheese is made backwards?
Edam.
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Funny Kids Joke
What goes dot, dot, dash, squeak?Mouse code!
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Blonde Joke - 2
Q. What did the blonde say when she knocked over a priceless Ming vase? A. 'It's okay Daddy, I'm not hurt. '
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Ethnic Joke - 2
Q: Why can't Chinese Barbecue?A: Because the rice falls through the grill
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Horse Joke
A leading trainer was given an eye test and was presented with a new pair of glasses. The optician said they would cost £200. 'Too much!' cried the trainer. 'They're bi-focal' said the optician. 'I don't care if they're by Phar Lap. It's too much. '
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Stupid Blonde Joke
A blonde decided that she was tired of her empty life. She cut her hair and dyed it brown, and set off for a drive. She wanted to do random acts of kindness to see if it would change her life. While driving through the countryside, she came across a farmer who was trying to get his sheep across the road. She stopped her car and waved the farmer across, thinking this would be her first good deed. After the sheep had all crossed, the blonde said to the farmer, 'your sheep are so cute. If I guess how many there are, could I have one. 'The farmer thought it impossible and told the blonde it was okay. '637', said the blonde. The farmer was amazed that the blonde had guessed the exact number, but lived up to his bargain. 'I'll take that feisty one over there', said the blonde. Then the farmer said to the blonde, 'Okay, now if I guess the real color of your hair, can I have my dog back?
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Cow Joke
Why was he woman arrested on a cattle ranch for wearing a silk dress? She was charged with rustling!
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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