|
|
|
The
Best Humor Sites on the Internet |
|
Christmas Jokes
Funny Jokes Online
MOCKERY
Ghost Pictures
Ghost Stories
Hilarious Horoscopes
Bizarre Webcam
notMENSA
society for the stupid
Cheap posters
Raunchiest Riddles
Worst Jobs in the World
Love Poems
Inspirational Poems
Funny Poems
Famous Poems
Free Diet Plans
Top Paying
Keywords
Keyword Suggestions
Everything you want to know about everything!
Weird eBay
mesothelioma types
Top 100 Baby Names
flowers online
Poker Articles
Free View Webcams
Work from Home
World History
Baby Name Chooser
Text Links
Online Advertising
Flowers
Top searches
Weird Website
Children's Books
Scottish Jokes
Robert Burns Poems
Midge Jokes
Fathers Jokes
Funny Jokes
Love Quotes
Famous Quotes
Inspirational Quotes
Funny Quotes
Movie Quotes
Friendship Quotes
Get Found
anime girls
5QS |
|
|
No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
| |
|
|
Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
|
|
|
|
|
|
Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
|
|
|
Archive of waterbed joke and other funny jokes |
|
Totally Weird Joke
MACINTOSH stands for. . . Most Applications Crash, If Not, The Operating System Hangs.
= = = = = = = = = =
Idiot and fool Joke
Chaffee could talk on any subject whether he knew anything about it or not. Mostly he didn't. One day his neighbor Nibley could stand no more. 'Do you realize, ' asked Nibley, 'that you and I know all there is to be known?' 'Do you really think so?' said Chaffee. 'How do you figure that?' 'Easy, ' answered Nibley. 'You know everything except that you're a damn idiot. And I know that!'
= = = = = = = = = =
Medicine Joke
A man is in a hospital bed completly wrapped up in a body cast. One of the nurses gave him a rectal thermometer and said, 'Don't move -- I'll be right back. 'When she returned the thermometer was in his mouth. She asked in amazement, 'How did you get that in your mouth, you can't even move?''I hiccupped. '
= = = = = = = = = =
Bumper Stickers - 1
Life is a sexually transmitted disease.
= = = = = = = = = =
Ethnical Joke
Sid and Al were sitting in a Chinese restaurant. 'Sid, ' asked Al, 'are there any Jews in China?''I don't know, ' Sid replied. 'Why don't we ask the waiter?'When the waiter came by, Al asked him, 'Are there any Chinese Jews?''I don't know sir, let me ask, ' the waiter replied, and he went into the kitchen. He returned in a few minutes and said, 'No, sir. No, Chinese Jews. ''Are you sure?' Al asked. 'I will check again, sir, ' the waiter replied and went back to the kitchen. While he was still gone, Sid said, 'I cannot believe there are no Jews in China. Our people are scattered everywhere. 'When the waiter returned he said, 'Sir, no Chinese Jews. ''Are you really sure?' Al asked again. 'I cannot believe there are no Chinese Jews. ''Sir, I ask everyone, ' the waiter replied exasperated. 'We have Orange Jews, Prune Jews, Tomato Jews and Grape Jews, but we have no Chinese Jews. '
= = = = = = = = = =
Top 100 Joke
Q: What did the raccoon say in his will?A: 'Leave it to Beaver. '
= = = = = = = = = =
Zoo Joke
A man went to work for a zoo veterinarian. 'Look in the lion's mouth, ' the vet told him. 'How do I do that?' he asked. 'Carefully, ' replied the vet.
= = = = = = = = = =
Mad Joke
There once was a brother and a sister, fraternal twins, who were approaching their high school graduation. It was getting near prom night and neither of them had a date for it. So one day, the girl approaches her brother and says 'Hey, you got a date for the prom yet?'He says 'No, why? You got someone lined up for me?' 'You might say that. Why don't you take me to the prom?''Take you? You kidding? You're my sister!' 'Well, are you taking somebody else out?''You know I don't have a date, Sis. ' 'And neither do I. But we both want to go to the prom, don't we?' Her brother nods. She continues, 'So we should go with each other. 'The brother can't see anything wrong with her reasoning, so he tells his sister that if neither of them has a date by Wednesday evening he will take her to the prom. Wednesday evening rolls around. Neither of the siblings has a date, so the brother tells his sister that he'll take her to the prom on Friday. At the prom, both of them have a good time. The brother is glad that his sister talked him into taking her. Then, while he's standing at the punch bowl, his sister comes up to him again. 'Hey, brother, let's dance. 'He looks around to make sure that nobody heard her. 'Look, Sis, this is the Senior Prom, okay? I'm not going to dance with my own sister at the prom, okay?''Don't be so shy. Look, Jimmy Elder is dancing with his cousin. So why can't you dance with your sister?''Oh . . . all right. 'So they dance, a slow number. The rest of the prom passes by and after a while it's over and time to go. Both of them have had a good time. In the car, with the brother at the wheel, the sister looks over at him and says, 'Let's not go straight home. 'He gives her a curious look and says, 'What are we going to do instead?''Oh, I don't know. Just drive around. 'He agrees, and after they have driven around a while, out in the country, she looks over at him again and says 'Want to find some place to park?''Hell, ' he says, 'are you crazy? You're my sister, I'm not going parking with you!''Who said anything about 'going parking'? Let's just pull over somewhere and talk for a while, okay? It's been a busy year for both of us-- how long has it been since we've had a chance to talk to each other?'So she finally talks her brother into pulling the car over on a secluded back road, and after a few minutes of idle talk, she looks over at him again. 'Hey . . . ' she says. 'What?''Why don't you kiss me?''You've been suggesting a lot of weird things lately, you know that? I'm not going to kiss you, you're my sister! 'And he reached for the ignition switch to start the car. She reached out and took his hand. 'I know I'm your sister. You've mentioned that a lot lately. And you're my brother. And don't we love each other? Why shouldn't we kiss if we feel like it?' She kissed him on the cheek and he kissed her back. After a few minutes of kissing, she whispered in his ear, 'Come on. Let's do it. ''Do what, ' said her brother, but he had a good idea of what his sister had in mind. 'You know what, ' his sister replied. 'I can't do that with you, you're my. . . ' His voice trailed off. While he was on top of her, his sister murmured, 'You know, you're a lot lighter than Dad. ''I know, ' said her brother. 'Mom told me. '
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
|
| |
|
