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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of urdu sexy joke and other funny jokes |
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Women Joke
8. What do you mean today's our anniversary? 7. Can we not talk to each other tonight? I'd rather just watch TV. 6. Ohhhhhh, this diamond is wayyyyyyyyy tooooooo big! 5. Can our relationship get a little more physical? I'm tired of being 'just friends' 4. Honey, does this outfit make my butt look too small? 3. Aww, don't stop for directions, I'm sure you'll be able to figure out how to get there. 2. I don't care if it's on sale, $300 is way to much for a designer dress. 1. Hey, pull my finger!
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Bumper Stickers - 4
I brake for…wait…AAAH!…NO BRAKES!!!!!
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Naughty Joke
How do you know when your girlfriend is too fat?When she sits on your face and you can't hear the stereo
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Bumper Stickers - 5
Laughter, cries and all that is wise. . .
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Apple Joke
If it took six pigs two hours to eat the apples in the orchard, how many hours would it take three pigs? None, because the six pigs have already eaten them all.
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Funny School Kids Joke
What is the smelliest city in America?
Phew York.
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Bar Joke - 2
A woman and her little girl were visiting the grave of the little girl's grandmother. On their way through the cemetery back to the car, the little girl asked, 'Mommy, do they ever bury two people in the same grave?''Of course not, dear, ' replied the mother, 'Why would you think that?''The tombstone back there said. . . 'Here lies a lawyer and an honest man. ''
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Computer Joke
How to Please Your I. T. Department 01. When you call us to have your computer moved, be sure to leave it buried under half a ton of postcards, baby pictures, stuffed animals, dried flowers, bowling trophies and children's art. We don't have a life, and we find it deeply moving to catch a fleeting glimpse of yours. 02. Don't write anything down. Ever. We can play back the error messages from here. 03. When an I. T. person says he's coming right over, go for coffee. That way you won't be there when we need your password. It's nothing for us to remember 700 screen saver passwords. 04. When you call the help desk, state what you want, not what's keeping you from getting it. We don't need to know that you can't get into your mail because your computer won't power on at all. 05. When I. T. support sends you an E-Mail with high importance, delete it at once. We're just testing. 06. When an I. T. person is eating lunch at his desk, walk right in and spill your guts right out. We exist only to serve. 07. Send urgent email all in uppercase. The mail server picks it up and flags it as a rush delivery. 08. When the photocopier doesn't work, call computer support. There's electronics in it. 09. When something's wrong with your home PC, dump it on an I. T. person's chair with no name, no phone number and no description of the problem. We love a puzzle. 10. When an I. T. person tells you that computer screens don't have cartridges in them, argue. We love a good argument. 11. When an I. T. person tells you that he'll be there shortly, reply in a scathing tone of voice: 'And just how many weeks do you mean by shortly?' That motivates us. 12. When the printer won't print, re-send the job at least 20 times. Print jobs frequently get sucked into black holes. 13. When the printer still won't print after 20 tries, send the job to all 68 printers in the company. One of them is bound to work. 14. Don't learn the proper term for anything technical. We know exactly what you mean by 'My thingy blew up'. 15. Don't use on-line help. On-line help is for wimps.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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