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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of tonys trick and joke shop and other funny jokes |
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Bumper Stickers - 5
Impotence: Nature's Way Of Saying 'No Hard Feelings. '
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Weirdest Joke
At least now, Mr. Clinton, we understand why mattresses are discountedevery Presidents Day.
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Best Joke Online
There were three priests in a railroad station, all wanting to go home to Pittsburgh. Behind the ticket counter was a very, very shapely lass, well endowed, gorgeous, amazing woman. The priests were all in embarrassing new territory, so they drew straws to determine who would get the tickets. The first priest approached the window. . . 'Young lady, ' he began, 'I would like three pickets to titsburg. ' Whereupon he completely lost his composure and fled. The second priest approached. . . 'Young lady, I would like three tickets to Pittsburgh, ' he began, 'and I would like the change in nipples and dimes. ' He turns red and runs away. Then came the third. . . 'Young lady, I would like three tickets to Pittsburgh, and I would like the change in nickels and dimes. And I must say, ' he continued, 'if you insist on dressing like that when you get to the pearly gates - St. Finger's going to shake his peter at you!'
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Best Joke Online
The scene is a dark jungle. Two tigers are stalking through the undergrowth in single file when the one to the rear reaches out with his tongue and licks the bottom of the tiger in front. The startled tiger turns around and says, 'Hey! Cut it out, all right!'The rear tiger says, 'sorry, ' and they continue. After about another five minutes, the rear tiger again reaches out with his tongue and licks the bottom of the tiger in front. The front tiger turns around and cuffs the rear tiger and says, 'I said stop it!'The rear tiger says, 'sorry, ' and they continue. After about another five minutes, the rear tiger once more licks the bottom of the tiger in front. The front tiger turns around and asks the rear tiger, 'What is it with you, anyway?'The rear tiger replies, 'Well, I just ate a lawyer and I'm trying to get the taste out of my mouth!'
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Bumper Stickers - 1
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
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Animal World
What did the elephant say to the naked man?That's cute, but can it pick up peanuts!
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Law and Lawyer Joke
First person: Do you know how to save five lawyers who are drowning? Second person: No. First person: Good!
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Old Age Joke
What is the best birth control method for really-old seniors?
Nudity.
What's the most useless thing in Grandma's house?
Grandpa's thing.
The nice thing about being senile is you can hide your own Easter eggs.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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