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injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of tamil video jokes and other funny jokes |
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Ethnic Joke - 1
Did you hear about the fire in the rednecks library?Both the books got burned, and one hadn't even been coloured in yet.
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Bumper Stickers - 5
I'm wondering if you have any horns with goofy songs?
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Computers Joke
Pest-by-Modem Here's how to be a pest-by-modem:*Make up fake acronyms. On-line veterans like to use abbreviations likeIMHO (in my humble opinion) and RTFM (read the f. . . . . . manual) to showthat they're 'hep' to the lingo. Make up your own that don't stand foranything (SETO, BARL, CP30), use them liberally, and then refuse toexplain what they stand for ('You don't know? RTFM'). *WRITE ALL YOUR MESSAGES IN ALL CAPS AND DON'T USE PERIODS OR RETURNS SOTHAT EVERYONE HAS TO SCROLL ACROSS THEIR SCREENS TO READ EVERY LINE ALSOUSE A LOT OF !!!!!! AND DDOOUUBBLLEESS TO SHOW THAT YOU'RE EXCITED ABOUTBEING HERE!!!!!!!*When replying to your mail, correct everyone's grammar and spelling andpoint out their typos, but don't otherwise respond to the content oftheir messages. When they respond testily to your 'creative criticism, 'do it again. Continue until they go away. *Software and files offered on-line are often 'compressed' so that itwon't take so long to travel over the phone lines. Buy a compressionprogram and compress everything you send, including one-word E-mailresponses like 'Thanks. '*Upload text files with Bible passages about sin or guilt and give themnames like 'SexyHouseWives, ' then see how many people download them. Challenge your friends to come up with the most popular come-on. Takebets and calculate odds on the results of each upload's popularity. *cc: all your E-mail to Al Gore (vice. president@whitehouse. gov) so thathe can keep track of what's happening on the information SuperhighwayInternet. *Join a discussion group, and tie whatever's being discussed back to anunrelated central theme of your own. For instance, if you're in adiscussion of gun control, respond to every message with the observationthat those genetically superior tomatoes seem to have played an importantrole. Within days, all discussion of gun control will have ceased aspeople write you threatening messages and instruct all other members toignore you.
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Joke for Halloween
Some men in a pickup truck drove to a lumber yard. One of the men walked into the office and said, 'We need some four-by-twos. 'The clerk asked, 'You mean two-by-fours, don't you?'The man said, 'I'll go check, ' and went back to the truck. He returned shortly and said, 'Yeah, I meant two-by-four. ''All right. How long do you need them?'The customer paused for a moment and said, 'I'd better go check. 'After a while, he returned to the office and said, -'A long time. We're gonna build a house. . . '
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Ethnic Humor
At the Russian War College, the general is a guest lecturer and tells the class of officers that the session will focus on potential problems and the resulting strategies. One of the officers in the class begins by asking the first question, 'Will we have to fight a World War Three?' 'Yes, comrades, looks like you will, ' answers the general. 'And who will be our enemy, Comrade General?' another officer asks. 'The likelihood is that it will be China. ' The class looks alarmed, and finally one officer asks, 'But Comrade General, we are 150 million people and they are about 1. 5 billion. How can we possibly win?' 'Well, ' replies the general, 'Think about it. In modern war, it is not the quantity, but the quality that is the key. For example, in the Middle East, 5 million Jews fight against 50 million Arabs, and the Jews have been the winners every time. ' 'But sir , ' asks the panicky officer, 'Do we have enough jews'?
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Dirty Joke
Q: What is the one thing you will never hear a man say? A: Her tits are just too big.
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Relationships Joke
A man was complaining to a friend. 'I had it all. Money, a beautiful house, a BIG car, the love of a beautiful woman, then, POW! it was all gone!''What happened?' asked the friend. 'My wife found out. '
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Strange Humor
The latest news is, that Bill Clinton has bought a new cigar holder. Unfortunately, due to security reasons, they can't tell us her name!
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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