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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of strange pets for sale and other funny jokes |
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Bizarre Joke
A young man took a blind date to an amusement park. They went for a ride on the Ferris wheel. The ride completed, she seemed rather bored. 'What would you like to do next?' he asked. 'I wanna be weighed, ' she said. So the young man took her over to the weight guesser. 'One-twelve, ' said the man at the scale, and he was absolutely right. Next they rode the roller coaster. After that, he bought her some popcorn and cotton candy, then he asked what else she would like to do. 'I wanna be weighed, ' she said. I really latched onto a square one tonight, thought the young man, and using the excuse he had developed a headache, he took the girl home. The girl's mother was surprised to see her home so early, and asked, 'What's wrong, dear, didn't you have a nice time tonight?''Wousy!' said the girl.
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Relationships Joke
A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is smokinga cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face and the egg isfrowning and looking put out. The egg mutters to no one in particular, 'I guess we answered that question. '
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Family Comedy Joke
The head nun at the convent says, 'I found a pair of men's underwear under my desk!'Twenty nuns gasp, but one nun goes 'Heh, heh, heh. . . 'She says, 'And I found a used condom on my desk!'Twenty nuns gasp, but one nun goes 'Heh, heh, heh. . . 'She says, 'And there was a huge tear in the condom!'One nun gasps, but twenty nuns go, 'Heh, heh, heh. '
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Weather Joke
Q: What did the hurricane say to the other hurricane? A: I have my eye on you.
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Easter Joke
What has big ears, brings Easter treats, and goes 'hippity-BOOM, hippity-BOOM, hippity-BOOM'? The Easter Elephant.
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Face Joke
Q. What do me and a mirror have in common? A. When we see your face we both crack up!
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Weird Women Joke
These two women went out for a night on the town and got just totally sloshed. At the end of the evening they decided to take a short cut through a cow pasture after being unable to find a ride home. They became lost so split up to try and find the road home. One of the lushes doubled back only to stumble on the other flat on her back sucking on, and playing with a cow's udders. Her friend screamed 'what are you doing'? the other lush says 'shut up, with all these guys here someone'll drive us home'.
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Insect Joke
What do you get if you cross a worm and an elephant ? Very big worm holes in your garden !
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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