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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of strange limos and other funny jokes |
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Judge Joke
The defendant stood up in the dock and said to the judge, 'I dont recognize this court!' 'Why?' asked the Judge. 'Because you've had it decorated since the last time I was here. '
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Simple Joke
There was a man at a gas station, pumping gas into his truck. Whilepumping he got gas on his arm. He wiped some of it off, then forgotabout it. He paid for his gas and got in the truck. As he was driving down the road, he lit up a cigarette, and the gason his arm caught on fire. He rolled down the window and was wavinghis arm about, when he was pulled over by the cops. The officer charged him for improper use of firearms.
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Just for Laughs Joke
The Top 10 Things Overheard In A Tax Preparer's Office Prior To The Tax Filing Deadline No sir, the government does not want you to pay your taxes in pennies. I have a hard time believing that a garbage collector made $'150
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School Joke
Teacher : Make up a sentence using the word lettuce ! Pupil : Let us out of school early !
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Joke for Kids
One day a woman went to her pastor and asked, 'Pastor there are some things in life that aren't addressed in the Bible; how are we supposed to deal with them. The Pastor responded, 'There are no such things, give me an example of what you are talking about'. The woman responded, 'PMS is not in the Bible'. So the Pastor thought and told the woman to call back in the morning and he would have the answer. The woman called the next morning and asked if the Pastor had an answer about PMS in the Bible. The Pastor replied, 'Yes, it's the part where Mary rides Joseph's ass all the way to Bethlehem!!!'.
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Practical Joke
TOP 10 REASONS BASKETBALL IS BETTER THAN SEX. . . 10. BALL MOVEMENT IS KEY 9. YOU CAN SET IT UP OR GO FOR THE FASTBREAK8. IF YOU NEED A BREAK, YOU CAN CALL A 20 SECOND TIMEOUT 7. THERE IS A COACH TELLING YOU WHEN TO 'TAKE IT TO THE HOLE'6. BEING DOUBLE-TEAMED IS COMMON5. YOU CAN PASS IT OFF, SO YOUR BUDDY CAN SCORE 4. IF SCOUTS LIKE YOUR PERFORMANCE, YOU TURN PRO 3. YOU KNOW YOU ARE DONE WHEN THE HORN SOUNDS 2. YOU ALWAYS TRY TO SCORE WITHIN 24 SECONDS 1. THERE'S ALWAYS SOMEONE WITH A TOWEL TO CLEAN UP ANY WET SPOTS
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Dentist Joke
Patient: Doctor, I am very nervous. You know, this is my first extraction. Young dentist: Don't worry, it's my first extraction too.
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Fishing Joke
Three guys were fishing in a lake one day, when an angel appeared in the boat. When the three astonished men had settled down enough to speak, the first guy asked the angel humbly, 'I've suffered from back pain ever since I took shrapnel in the Vietnam War . . . Could you help me?' 'Of course, ' the angel said, and when he touched the man's back, the man felt relief for the first time in years. The second guy who wore very thick glasses and had a hard time reading and driving. He asked if the angel could do anything about his poor eyesight. The angel smiled, removed the man's glasses and tossed them into the lake. When they hit the water, the man's eyes cleared and he could see everything distinctly. When the angel turned to the third guy, the guy put his hands out defensively -- 'Don't touch me!' he cried, 'I'm on a disability pension. '
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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