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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of strange gifts and other funny jokes |
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Waiter Joke
Waiter: I'm sorry I spilled a glass of water on you. Diner: That's all right. My suit is too large anyway.
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Barbie doll Joke
There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Battering Ram Barbie . . . Barbie's head on the end of a battering ram
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Love and Marriage Joke
A husband and wife love to golf together, but neither of them areplaying like they want to, so they decide to take private lessons. The husband has his lesson first. After the pro sees his swing, hesays, 'No no, no, you're gripping the club way too hard!''Well, what should I do?' asks the man. 'Hold the club gently, ' the pro replied, 'just like you'd hold your wife's breast. 'The man takes the advice, takes a swing, and POW! He hits the ball250 yds. straight up the fairway. The man goes back to his wifewith the good news, and the wife can't wait for her lesson. The next day the wife goes for her lesson. The pro watches herswing and says, 'No, no, no, you're gripping the club way too hard. ''What can I do?' asks the wife. 'Hold the club gently, just like you'd hold your husband's penis. 'The wife listens carefully to the pro's advice, takes a swing, andTHUMP. The ball goes straight down the fairway. . . about 15 ft. 'That was great, ' the pro says with a straight face. 'Now, take the club out of your mouth and swing it like you're supposed to!'
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Math Joke
Teacher: 'Who can tell me what 7 times 6 is?'
Student: 'It's 42!'
Teacher: 'Very good! - And who can tell me what 6 times 7 is?'
Same student: 'It's 24!'
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Worst Joke
What did one casket say to the other ?Was that you coffin?
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Aardvark Joke
Who's aardvark's favorite male singer? Frank Sinostril!
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Totally Weird Joke
Yo momma so stupid she took a spoon to the superbowl.
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Old age Joke
An old man visits his doctor and after thorough examination the doctor tells him: 'I have good news and bad news, what would you like to hear first?' Patient: 'Well, give me the bad news first. ' Doctor: 'You have cancer, I estimate that you have about two years left. ' Patient: 'OH NO! That's awefull! In two years my life will be over! What kind of good news could you probably tell me, after this???' Doctor: 'You also have Alzheimer's. In about three months you are going to forget everything I told you. '
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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