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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of strange days soundtrack and other funny jokes |
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Bus Joke
Janet: What's the difference between a cake and a school bus ? Jill: I don't know. Janet: I'm glad I didn't send you to pick up my birthday cake !
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Knock Knock Joke - 1
Knock Knock Who's there ? Clown ! Clown who ? Clown for the count !
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Rabbit Joke
What do you get when you cross a bunny with an orange? A pip squeak.
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War Joke
Two men were boasting to each other about their old army days. 'Why, my outfit was so well drilled, ' declared one, 'that when they presented arms all you could hear was slap, slap, click. ''Very good, ' conceded the other, 'but when my company presented arms you'd just hear slap, slap, jingle. ''What was the jingle?' asked the first. 'Oh, ' replied the other off hand, 'just our medals. '
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Aardvark Joke
I've got a new aardvark. Would you like to play with him? I don't really know. I've heard it growling, it doesn't sound very friendly. Does it bite? That's what I want to find out.
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Old People Joke
How do I know that my youth is all spent?Well, my get up and go has got up and went. But in spite of it all I am able to grinwhen I recall where my get up has been. Old age is golden-so I've heard it said-but sometimes I wonder when I get into bed, with my ears in a drawer and my teeth in a cup, my eyes on the table until I wake up. Ere sleep dims my eyes I say to myself, 'Is there anything else I should lay on the shelf?'And I'm happy to say as I close my door, my friends are the same, perhaps even more. When I was young, my slippers were red, I could pick up my heels right over my head. When I grew older, my slippers were blue, but still I could dance the whole night through. But now I am old, my slippers are black, I walk to the store and puff my way back. The reason I know my youth is all spent, my get up and go has got up and went. But I really don't mind when I think, with a grin, of all the grand places my get up has been. Since I have retired from life's competition, I accommodate myself with complete repetition. I get up each morning, and dust off my wits, pick up my paper and read the 'obits'. If my name is missing, I know I'm not dead, so I eat a good breakfast and go back to bed
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Bumper Stickers - 2
What part of 'No' don't you understand?
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Mental health Joke
How many Borderline P. D. does to take to change a lightbulb? Just one. To threaten suicide if you don't change it for him/her.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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