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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of stand up comedy training and other funny jokes |
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Political Joke
Three Republicans walk into a bar. The bartender says, 'We don't serve Republicans here. ' The Republicans say, 'That's OK. . . We don't serve you either.
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Doctor Joke
Then theres the woman who goes to the dentist. As he leans over to begin working on her, she grabs his crotch. The dentist says, 'Madam, I believe youve got a hold of my privates. ' The woman replies, 'Yes. Now, were going to be careful not to hurt each other, arent we. '
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Village Idiot Joke
The problem with keeping an open mind is that all my ideas tend to fall out.
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Mouse Joke
What's a mouse's favourite record ? Please cheese me !
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Firefighter Joke
A man who worked at a fire hydrant factory was always late for work. When confronted by his boss the man explained: 'You can't park anywhere near this place!'
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Dog Joke - 1
How do you feel if you cross a sheepdog with a melon ? Melon-collie !
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Spoof Joke
The Difference between Most Men and REAL Men Real Men. . put you on the phone when their mothers call. Most Men. . pretend you're not there when their moms call. Real Men. . claim to be feminist but still insist on opening doors, driving, and paying for dinner. Most Men. . claim to be feminists because they let YOU open doors, drive, and pay for dinner. Real Men. . know what they want to be doing five years down the road. Most Men. . are not sure what they want to be doing later tonight. Real Men. . really know how to make you relax. Most Men. . . really know how to make you laugh. Real Men. . read Crichton, watch Rather, play golf. Most Men. . read King, watch Seinfeld, play poker. Real Men. . make a lot of money before they are 30. Most Men. . make a lot of mistakes before they are 30. Real Men. . wear ties with stripes, shirts with buttons, and shoes with laces. Most Men. . wear high school T-shirts they've actually owned since high school. Real Men. . think perfume (yours) is a turn-on. Most Men. . think sweat (theirs) is a turn-on. Real Men. . balance their checkbooks. Most Men. . balance their loans so that they never hit up the same buddy twice in a row. Real Men. . have an internist, a tailor and an accountant. Most Men. . have a barber, a bartender and a mechanic. Real Men. . are afraid of becoming their fathers. Most Men. . are afraid of becoming Real Men. Real Men. . start their own businesses. Most Men. . quit their jobs. Real Men. . order wine based on more than the price. Most Men. . bring their own beer
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Music Joke
Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get away from the bagpipe recital.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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