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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of stand up comedy jokes and other funny jokes |
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Animal Joke
A preacher is buying a parrot. 'Are you sure it doesn't scream, yell, or swear?' asked the preacher. 'Oh absolutely. It's a religious parrot, ' the storekeeper assures him. 'Do you see those strings on his legs? When you pull the right one, he recites the lord's prayer, and when you pull on the left he recites the 23rd Psalm. ''Wonderful!' says the preacher, 'but what happens if you pull both strings?''I fall off my perch, you stupid fool!' screeched the parrot.
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Book title Joke
The Japenese Way of Death by Harri Kirri
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Weather Joke
What did the hurricane say to the palm tree? -Hang onto your leaves, this will be no ordinary breeze
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Sport Joke
There was a Packers fan with a really crappy seat at Lambeau. Looking with his binoculars, he spotted an empty seat on the 50-yard line. Thinking to himself 'what a waste' he made his way down to the empty seat. When he arrived at the seat, he asked the man sitting next to it, 'Is this seat taken?' The man replied, 'This was my wife's seat. She passed away. She was a big Packers fan. ' The other man replied, 'I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. May I ask why you didn't give the ticket to a friend or a relative?' The man replied, 'They're all at the funeral. '
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Sports Humor
Four married guys go golfing. During the 4th hole the followingconversation took place:First Guy: 'You have no idea what I had to do to be able to come outgolfing this weekend. I had to promise my wife that I will paint every room in the house next weekend. 'Second Guy: 'That's nothing, I had to promise my wife that I will buildher a new deck for the pool. 'Third Guy: 'Man, you both have it easy! I had to promise my wife that Iwill remodel the kitchen for her. 'They continue to play the hole when they realized that the fourth guy hasnot said a word. So they ask him, ' You haven't said anything about what you had to do to be able to come golfing this weekend. What's the deal?'Fourth Guy: 'I just set my alarm for 5:30a. m. , When it goes off, I shut off my alarm, give the wife a budge and say, 'Golf Course or Intercourse?' So she says, 'Wear your sweater. '
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War Joke
Q: Why did the Navy switch to liquid soap?A: It's harder to pick up.
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Bumper Stickers - 7
Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?
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Cow Joke
What's a moo hoo for a stuffed steer? A full bull!
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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