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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of sonic fun games and other funny jokes |
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Money Joke
How can you double your money? Look at it in a mirror.
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Great Joke
Guy walks into the bar, goes up to the bartender. Reaching into his pants pocket, he pulls out a hundred dollar bill. 'Set up everybody in the place!' he shouts. The bartender obliges. Suddenly, a little man jumps out of the guy's pocket, runs down the bar, and kicks all of the drinks, smokes, change, etc on the floor. He runs back and jumps back into the guy's pocket. The Bartender asks what's going on. The guy just reaches back into his pants pocket, pulls out another hundred, and says 'just set everybody up again. ' Bartender obliges once more, suspiciously watching the guy. Once more the little man appears from the guy's shirt pocket. Runs down the bar, breaks the glasses, pitches the napkins into the air, etc. Runs back and jumps into the shirt pocket again. This time the guy buttons the pocket. Bartender says 'explain yourself, or leave. 'Guy says 'Well. . . . I was walking down the beach one day, and ran across a bottle in the sand. Turns out there is a Genie in the bottle. Gave me 3 wishes!So my first wish was to never run out of cash again. Now every time I reach into my pants pocket there is a hundred dollar bill!Second wish was to never be lonely again. Went back to my apartment and there waiting for me were 3 of the most beatuiful supermodels you have ever seen, all willing to do whatever I desired from them!''Third wish. . . I wished for a 6 inch prick, and THIS IS THE LITTLE BASTARD I GOT!!!'
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Hair and bald Joke
A man enters a barber shop for a shave. While the barber is foaming him up, he mentions the problems he has getting a close shave around the cheeks. 'I have just the thing, ' says the barber taking a small wooden ball from a nearby drawer. 'Just place this between your cheek and gum. ' The client places the ball in his mouth and the barber proceeds with the closest shave the man has ever experienced. After a few strokes the client asks in garbled speech. 'And what if I swallow it?' 'No problem, ' says the barber. 'Just bring it back tomorrow like everyone else does. '
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Stupid Men
Why do men have bigger brains than dogs?
So they won't hump your leg at a cocktail party.
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Government Humor
Why did the chicken cross the road?- To escape an oppressive military regime.
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Cop Joke
A police car pulls up in front of grandma Bessie's house, and grandpa Morris gets out. The polite policeman explained that this elderly gentleman said that he was lost in the park. . . and couldn't find his way home. ' Oy Morris ', said grandma, ' You've been going to that park for over 30 years ! So how could you get lost ? ' Leaning close to grandma, so that the policeman couldn't hear. Morris whispered, ' I wasn't lost. . . . . I was just too tired to walk home. '
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Car and train Joke
Policeman: How can you drive so recklessly? Driver: I have to, this is a getaway car.
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Ethnic Joke - 1
The only good thing to ever come out of Oklahoma: An empty greyhound.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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