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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of silly sms and other funny jokes |
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Lawyer Joke
One day, there was this lawyer who had just bought a new car, and he was eager to show it off to his colleagues, when all of a sudden an eighteen wheeler came out of nowhere and took of the driver's side door with him standing right there. 'NOOO!' he screamed, because he knew that no matter how good a mechanic tried to fix it, it never would be the same. Finally, a cop came by, and the lawyer ran up to him yelling, 'MY JAGUAR DOOR WAS JUST RUINED BY SOME FOOLISH DRIVER!!!' he exclaimed. 'You're a lawyer aren't you?' asked the policeman. 'Yes, I am, but what does this have to do with my car?!?!' the lawyer asked. 'HA! You lawyers are always so materialistic. All you care about is your possessions. I bet you didn't even notice that your left arm is missing did you?' the cop said. The lawyer looked down at his side and exclaimed, 'MY ROLEX!'
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Food and Drink Joke
Knock Knock Who's there ! Beef ! Beef who ? Beef fair now !
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Funny Joke - 50 best Joke
Why do women have smaller feet than men? - It allows them to stand closer to the sink.
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Mom and Dad Joke
There was a woman who was pregnant with twins, and shortly before they were due, she had an accident and went into a coma. Her husband was away on business, and unable to be reached. While in the coma, she gave birth to her twins, and the only person around to name her children was her brother. When the mother came out of her coma to find she had given birth and that her brother had named the twins, she became very worried, because he wasn't a very bright guy. She was sure he had named them something absurd or stupid. When she saw her brother she asked him about the twins. He said, 'The first one was a girl. 'The mother: 'What did you name her?!?'Brother: 'Denise!'The Mom: 'Oh, wow, that's not bad! What about the second one?'Brother: 'The second one was a boy. 'The Mom: 'Oh, and what did you name him?'Brother: 'Denephew. '
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Politics Humor
Two farmers were talking at the general store. One farmer says to the other, 'Did you hear about that new variety of corn called Perot corn?' The second farmer replies, 'No I ain't. ' The first farmer says, 'Yeah, it's a big yielding variety. The stalk don't grow too big, but the ears are tremendous!'
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Humorous Joke
What's the difference between ignorance and indifference? I don't know and I don't care!
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Witch Joke
Q: What kind of witch goes to the beach? A: Sandwitch
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School Joke
Teacher: This note from your father looks like your handwriting ? Pupil: Well, yes, he borrowed my pen !
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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