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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of silly sentences and other funny jokes |
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Funny College Joke
Professor: A wise man doubts everything. Only a pin-head is positive. Student: Are you sure of that, sir? Professor: Positive.
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Yo Mama Joke
Yo mama is so fat that when she was diagnosed with the flesh eating disease the doctor gave her 18 years to live.
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Police Joke
A rookie police officer was out for his first ride in a cruiser with an experienced partner. A call came in telling them to disperse some people who were loitering. The officers drove to the street and observed a small crowd standing on a corner. The rookie rolled down his window and said, 'Let's get off the corner people. ' A few glances, but no one moved, so he barked again, 'Let's get off that corner. . . NOW!' Intimidated, the group of people began to leave, casting puzzled stares in his direction. Proud of his first official act, the young policeman turned to his partner and asked, 'Well, how did I do?' Pretty good, ' chuckled the vet, 'especially since this is a bus stop. '
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Funny Kids Joke
Where do frogs leave their hats and coats?In the croakroom!
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Knock Knock Joke - 2
Knock Knock Who's there ! Borg ! Borg who ? Borg standard !
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Relationships Joke
A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter. 'What are you doing?' She asked. 'Hunting Flies' He responded. 'Oh. Killing any?' She asked. 'Yep, 3 males, 2 Females, ' he replied. Intrigued, she asked. 'How can you tell?'He responded, '3 were on a beer can, 2 were on the phone. '
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Great Joke
Little Johnny has to stay at Grandma's for the weekend. Being an old school gal, bathing Little Johnny with her, Grandma sees no harm. So, there they are in the shower and Johnny points to Grandma's crotch and says, 'Grandma, what's that?!?'Grandma, somewhat shocked, quickly replies, 'That's my beaver, Johnny. ''Oh, okay. ' And this answer seems to appease Johnny's curiousity. Well, Johnny returns home, and one morning, Mom is running late for work. She decides that to save time, she'd bathe Johnny with her. Off to the shower, and once again, Johnny sees something not so familiar to him. 'Mom, what's that?' asks Johnny pointing to Mom's nether regions. Taken back, Mom says, 'Johnny, that's my beaver. 'Johnny replies, 'I thought so. I think Grandma's is dead. Its tongue is hanging out and its all gray and wrinkled!'
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Legal Humor
A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing atthe counter methodically placing 'Love' stamps on bright pink envelopes with heartsall over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all overthem. His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man andasks him what he is doing. The man says 'I'm sending out '1
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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