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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of silly clips and other funny jokes |
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Bus Joke
What's the difference between a bus driver and a cold? A bus driver knows the stops, and a cold stops the nose.
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Movie and TV Joke
Q: How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Just one. . . but how do you get him in there with the cute, blonde?
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School Joke for Kids
The old couple were planning to go on a second honeymoon for their 50th wedding anniversary. The old woman said, 'We will go to all the same places that we did on our first honeymoon. ' 'Uh huh, ' said the old man. 'We will do all the things that we did on our first honeymoon, ' said the old woman. 'Uh huh, ' said the old man. 'And we will make love like we did on our first honeymoon, ' said the oldwoman. 'That's right, ' said the old man, 'except this time I get to sit on the side of the bed and cry, 'It's too big, it's too big!''
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Funny Kids Joke
Q: What looks like half a cat?A: The other half!Q: What was the name of the film about a killer lion that swam underwater?A: 'Claws. ' Q: If a four-legged animal is a quadruped and a two-legged animal is a biped, What's a tiger?A: A stri-ped!Q: What do you get if you cross a tiger with a sheep?A: A stripey sweater!Q: How does a lion greet the other animals in the field?A: 'Pleased to eat you. '!Q: What do you get if you cross a tiger with a snowman?A: Frostbite!Q: What did the lions say to his cubs when he taught them to hunt?A: 'Don't go over the road till you see the zebra crossing. ' Q: What is lion's favorite food?A: Baked beings!
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School Joke
Teacher : What is the most common phrase used in school ? Pupil : I don't know Teacher: Correct !
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Snake Joke
Q: What kind of snake is good at math? A: An adder.
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Mad Joke
A city slicker wanted to buy a farm. He found just what he was looking for. During an inspection of the property, however, he found a hive of bees. He told the owner that he was deathly afraid of bees, and there was no way he could consider this piece of land. The landowner assured him that the bees were completely harmless, but the buyer would have no part of it. Finally, the landowner made an offer. The buyer would allow himself to be tied to a tree for an hour, nude, under the nest. So sure of the friendliness of his bees was the farmer that if ONE bee were to sting him, the farm would be his for free. The buyer thought it over and decided it was worth the risk. An hour later, the farmer walked out to the tree and saw the poor guy slumped over in his bindings. Fearing the worst, he ran up to him and asked if he had been stung. The city fella looked up and weakly said, 'No. . . the bees never touched me - but doesn't that calf have a mother!?!'
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Animal World
Why do dogs stick their noses in women's crotches?Because they can.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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