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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of send jokes to mobile and other funny jokes |
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Criminal Joke
Who is the strongest thief? A shoplifter.
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Funniest Joke
A blond and a brunette are on an elevator, suddenly a good lookinghandsome man gets on. So then the brunette turns to the blond and says, 'Wow', he is sogood looking, but that dandruff on him is a real turn off'. 'I think we should give him some Head and Shoulders!' said thebrunette. All of a sudden the blond turned to the brunette with a confusedlook and said, 'Ok, but how do you give shoulders?'
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Knock Knock Joke - 1
Knock Knock Who's there ! Alexia ! Alexia who ? Alexia again to open this door !
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Situations Humor
A bunch of Indians capture a cowboy named 'Clint', and bring him back to their camp to meet the chief. The chief says to Clint, 'You going to die. But we sorry for you, so give you one wish a day for three days. On sundown of third day, you die. What is first wish?' Clint says, 'I want to see my horse. ' The Indians get his horse. Clint grabs the horse's ear and whispers something, then slaps the horse on the ass. The horse takes off. Two hours later, the horse comes back with a naked blonde. She jumps off the horse and goes into the teepee with Clint. The Indians look at each other, figuring, 'Typical white man - can only think of one thing. ' The second day, the chief says, 'What your wish today?' Clint says, 'I want to see my horse again. ' The Indians bring him his horse. Clint leans over to the horse and whispers something in the horse's ear, then slaps it on the ass. Two hours later, the horse comes back with a naked redhead. She gets off and goes in the teepee with the Clint. The Indians shake their heads, figuring, 'Typical white man - going to die tomorrow and can only think of one thing. ' The last day comes, and the chief says, 'This your last wish, white man. What you want?' Clint says, 'I want to see my horse again. ' The Indians bring him his horse. Clint grabs the horse by both ears, twists them hard and yells, 'Read my lips! POSSE, damn it! P-O-S-S-E!'
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Blonde Joke - 3
Q: Why can't blondes put in light bulbs? A: They keep breaking them with the hammers.
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Elephant Joke
How does an elephant get down from a tree ? He sits on a leaf and waits till autumn !
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Joke for Speeches
'Oh doctor, ' moaned the woman to the psychiatrist. 'Everyone calls me a nymphomaniac!''I understand, ' said the shrink. 'But I'll be able to take better notes if you'll let go of my cock!'
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Computers Joke
An actual mailing:Greetings, You have just received the 'IRISH VIRUS'. As we don't have any programming experience, this virus works on the honor system. Please delete all the files on your hard drive manually and forward this virus to everyone on your mailing list. Thank you for your cooperation.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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