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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
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pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of sardarji hindi jokes and other funny jokes |
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Law Enforcement Joke
Traffic was backed up for miles, the police were going car to car. When they got to my car I asked the officer what was going on. He said 'It's Al Gore. He's up there threatening to set himself on fire! We are going car to car collecting donations. ' 'Donations!' I said, 'How much you got so far?' He said 'about ten gallons. '
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Ethnic Joke - 1
One day there was an indian chief who was constipated. he sent one of hiswarriors to the witch doctor to get some medicine. The warrior says 'BigChief, no shit'. the doctor gave him 1 pill and told him that the chiefshould be fine tomorrow. The warrior went back to the chief and gave him the pill. the next morningthe warrior was sent back to the witch doctor and says 'big chief, no shit'. the doctor gives him five pills and tells him to give them to the chief. The next day the warrior appears at the witch doctor's house yet againsaying 'big chief, no shit'. the doctor gets annoyed and so gives thewarrior the whole bottle of pills to give to the chief. The next day the warrior goes back to the witch doctor (AGAIN):'Big shit, no chief'.
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Old age Joke
A small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand in a trial--a grandmotherly, elderly woman. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy. And frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a rising big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you. ' The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Williams, do you know the defense attorney?' She again replied, 'Why, yes I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. I used to baby-sit him for his parents. And he, too, has been a real disappointment to me. He's lazy, bigoted, he has a drinking problem. The man can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the shoddiest in the entire state. Yes, I know him. ' At this point the judge rapped the courtroom to silence and called both counselors to the bench. In a very quiet voice, he said with menace, 'If either of you asks her if she knows me, you'll be in jail for contempt within 5 minutes!'
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Cop Joke
Late one Friday night the policeman spotted a man driving very erratically through the streets of Dublin. They pulled the man over and asked him if he had been drinking that evening. 'Aye, so I have. 'Tis Friday, you know, so me and the lads stopped by the pub where I had six or seven pints. And then there was something called 'Happy Hour' and they served these mar-gar-itos which are quite good. I had four or five o' those. Then I had to drive me friend Mike home and O' course I had to go in for a couple of Guinness - couldn't be rude, ye know. Then I stopped on the way home to get another bottle for later . . ' And the man fumbled around in his coat until he located his bottle of whiskey, which he held up for inspection. The officer sighed, and said, 'Sir, I'm afraid I'll need you to step out of the car and take a breathalyzer test. ' Indignantly, the man said, 'Why? Don't ye believe me? !'
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Joke for Kids
What did Snow White say when she sat on Pinoccio's nose?'Tell a lie. '
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Apple Joke
How do you get the most apples at Halloween? Take a snorkel.
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Joke for Speeches
A guy noticed that his buddy was troubled and asked what was wrong. 'Ohhh, it's my girlfriend. ' 'Oh yeah? What's the problem?''When I asked her if she could learn to love me, ' he said, 'she asked me how much I was willing to spend on her education. '
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Romance Joke
Two newlyweds are riding in the back of a limo on the way to their honeymoon boat cruise. The husband says, 'Honey, I want to stop and pick up some condoms before we go. ' 'Good idea, ' she says. 'While you're in there, pick me up some Dramamine. 'The groom gets out, walks into the drugstore and says to the clerk, 'I'd like a box of condoms and a package of Dramamine, please. ''Yes sir, says the clerk, 'but do you mind if I ask you a question? If it makes you nauseous, why do you do it?'
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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