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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of rude valentine jokes and other funny jokes |
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Bible Joke
Recently a teacher, a garbage collector, and a lawyer wound up together at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter informed them that in order to get into Heaven, they would each have to answer one question. St. Peter addressed the teacher and asked, 'What was the name of the ship that crashed into theiceberg? They just made a movie about it. ' The teacher answered quickly, 'That would be the Titanic. ' St. Peter let him through the gate. St. Peter turned to the garbage man and, figuring Heaven didn't REALLY need all the odors that this guy would bring with him, decided to make the question a little harder: 'How many people died on the ship?' Fortunately for him, the trash man had just seen the movie and answered, 'about '1
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Mom and Dad Joke
A woman got on a bus holding a baby. The bus driver said: 'That's the ugliest baby I've ever seen. 'In a huff, the woman slammed her fare into the fare box and took an aisle seat near the rear of the bus. The man seated next to her sensed that she was agitated and asked her what was wrong. 'The bus driver insulted me, ' she fumed. The man sympathized and said: 'Why, he's a public servant and shouldn't say things to insult passengers. ''You're right, ' she said. 'I think I'll go back up there and give him a piece of my mind. ''That's a good idea, ' the man said. 'Here, let me hold your monkey. '
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Knock Knock Joke - 2
Knock Knock Who's there ! Billy Bragg ! Billy Bragg who ? Billy Braggs too much, tell him to stop it !
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Firefighter Joke
Q. How can you tell when a Chicago Fireman is dead? A. The remote control slips from his hand.
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Parent Joke
Dad, said Rickey, 'what is electricity?' 'Uh, ' replied his father, 'I don't really know too much about electricity. ' A few minutes later the boy said, 'How does gas make the engine go?' 'Son, I'm afraid I don't know much about motors. ' 'Dad, ' said the boy, 'what is anthropology?' 'Anthropology?' The father frowned. 'I really don't know. ' 'Gee, Dad, I guess I'm making a nuisance of myself. ' 'Not at all, son. If you don't ask questions, you'll never learn anything. '
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Women Joke
Finally, something other than smiley faces. . . . Perfect breasts(o)(o)Fake silicone breasts( + )( + )Perky breasts(*)(*)Big nipple breasts(@)(@)A cupso oD cups{ O }{ O }Wonder bra breasts(oYo)Cold breasts( ^ )( ^ )Lopsided breasts(o)(O)Pierced Breasts(Q)(O)Hanging Tassels Breasts(p)(p)Against The Shower Door Breasts( )( )Android Breasts o o Martha Stewart's Breasts($)($)OK Girls--now that you have had your laugh, remember breast cancer awareness -- so have those boobs checked out and stay healthy. . .
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Bumper Stickers - 7
The next time you feel like complaining, remember: Your garbage disposal probably eats better than thirty percent of the people in this world.
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Sport Joke
Q: How does Stan Collymore change a lightbulb? A: He holds it in the air, and the world revolves around him
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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