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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of ricer jokes and other funny jokes |
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Military Joke
The following is supposedly a true story relating a situation that actually occurred in Los Angeles. The Marines were backing-up LAPD on a call that someone had broken into a store. At the scene, the cop told the Marines to 'cover' him as he approched the store (to police, 'cover' means to point your weapons in the direction of the threat, to Marines it means lay down a base of fire!). The Marines promptly laid down a base of fire. The Marines fired 178 rounds before they stopped shooting. The thief, probably a little scared at this point, called 911 and reported, 'They're shooting at me!'.
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Music Joke
Q: What is the difference between a violist and a terrorist? A: Terrorists have sympathizers.
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Zodiac Joke
Q: How many Virgos does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Approximately 1. 000000 with an error of +/- 1 millionth.
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Waiter Joke
Diner: May I please have a glass of water? Waiter: Why, are you thirsty? Diner: No, I want to see if my neck leaks.
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Teeth Joke
What did the vampire call his false teeth? A new fangled device.
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Worst Joke
'Haul a Yugo. Haul a Yugo. ' Gearly beloved, we are Blazered here in the name of our Four-door, who art in Half-ton. I'm speaking of our lord and Mazda, Jeep-sus Chrysler. He is the Alfa and the Romeo. He was born in a Ranger, he was Tempo'd by the DeVille, and he Daihatsu'd for your Sentras. He said, 'Dodge not, that ye not be Dodged. Thou shalt not Corvette thy neighbor's Whitewall, but turn the other Cherokee. If ye have Fiat, ye can move Montecarlos. He ain't Chevy, he's my Beretta. ' He ate the Last Supra, and he climbed the mount of Cavalier, where they Cruise-controlled him on the Motocross. But God, in his Infiniti Mercedes, did Rolls away the Stanza. Let us Prelude: Sayeth the prophet Isuzu, in the Dusenburg Bible, In the 23rd Saab, 'The Ford is my Chauffeur. I shall not Walk. He Lexus me in the paths of Right-turn-signals. Yea, though I walk through the Valet of the Shadow of Dart, I shall Fiero no Eagle. Subaru Goo dwrench and Mercury shall Volvo me Audi Daytonas of my life, and I shall Dwellmeter house of Delorean, Four-cylinder. ' Gloria, In Ex-Celica Geo!
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Knock Knock Joke - 2
Knock Knock Who's there ! Allegra ! Allegra who ? Allegra is broken !
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Car and train Joke
Did you hear about the boy who had to do a project on trains? He had to keep track of everything!
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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