|
|
|
The
Best Humor Sites on the Internet |
|
Christmas Jokes
Funny Jokes Online
MOCKERY
Ghost Pictures
Ghost Stories
Hilarious Horoscopes
Bizarre Webcam
notMENSA
society for the stupid
Cheap posters
Raunchiest Riddles
Worst Jobs in the World
Love Poems
Inspirational Poems
Funny Poems
Famous Poems
Free Diet Plans
Top Paying
Keywords
Keyword Suggestions
Everything you want to know about everything!
Weird eBay
mesothelioma types
Top 100 Baby Names
flowers online
Poker Articles
Free View Webcams
Work from Home
World History
Baby Name Chooser
Text Links
Online Advertising
Flowers
Top searches
Weird Website
Children's Books
Scottish Jokes
Robert Burns Poems
Midge Jokes
Fathers Jokes
Funny Jokes
Love Quotes
Famous Quotes
Inspirational Quotes
Funny Quotes
Movie Quotes
Friendship Quotes
Get Found
anime girls
5QS |
|
|
No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
| |
|
|
Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
|
|
|
|
|
|
Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
|
|
|
Archive of retirement party jokes and other funny jokes |
|
Dog Joke - 1
Alsation: How did you find the fleas? Beagle: I didn't! They found me!
= = = = = = = = = =
Bumper Stickers - 1
Friends don't let Friends drive Naked.
= = = = = = = = = =
Blonde Joke - 2
Q. How do you confuse a blonde? A. Put her in a circular room and tell her to sit in the corner.
= = = = = = = = = =
Funny Famous Joke
On a farm out in the country lived a man and a woman and their three sons. Early one morning, the woman awoke, and while looking out of the window onto to the pasture, she saw that the family's only cow was lying dead in the field. The situation looked hopeless to her -- how could she possibly continue to feed her family now?In a depressed state of mind, she hung herself. When the husband awoke to find his wife dead, as well as the cow, he too began to see the hopelessness of the situation, and he shot himself in the head. Now the oldest son woke up to discover his parents dead (and the cow!), and he decided to go down to the river and drown himself. When he got to the river, he discovered a mermaid sitting on the bank. She said, 'I've seen all and know the reason for your despair. But if you will have sex with me five times in a row, I will restore your parents and the cow to you. 'The son agreed to try, but after four times, he was simply unable to satisfy her again. So the mermaid drowned him in the river. Next the second oldest son woke up. After discovering what had happened, he too decided to throw himself into the river. The mermaid said to him, 'If you will have sex with me ten times in a row, I will make everything right. ' And while the son tried his best (seven times!), it was not enough to satisfy the mermaid, so she drowned him in the river. The youngest son woke up and saw his parents dead, the dead cow in the field, and his brothers gone. He decided that life was a hopeless prospect, and he went down to the river to throw himself in. And there he also met the mermaid. 'I have seen all that has happened, and I can make everything right if you will only have sex with me fifteen times in a row. 'The young son replied, 'Is that all? Why not twenty times in a row?'The mermaid was somewhat taken aback by this request. Then he said, 'Hell, why not twenty-five times in a row?' And even as she was reluctantly agreeing to his request, he said, 'Why not THIRTY times in a row?'Finally, she said, 'Enough!! Okay, if you will have sex with me thirty times in a row, then I will bring everybody back to perfect health. ' Then the young son asked, 'Wait! How do I know that thirty times in a row won't kill you like it did the cow?'
= = = = = = = = = =
Yo momma Joke
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to Taco Bell, they run for the border !!
= = = = = = = = = =
Doctor and nurse Joke
Doctor Doctor I feel like biscuits! What, you mean those square ones? Yes! The ones you put butter on? Yes! Oh, You're Crackers!
= = = = = = = = = =
Funny College Joke
The following are new Error Messages are planned for Windows 2000:1) Smash forehead on keyboard to continue. 2) Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue. 3) Press any key to continue or any other key to quit. 4) Press any key. . . no, no, no, NOT THAT ONE! 5) Press Ctrl-Alt-Del now for IQ test. 6) Close your eyes and press escape three times. 7) Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner. 8) This will end your Windows session. Do you want to play another game? 9) Windows message: 'You have just made a type mismatch! Shall I format your brain?' 10) This is a message from God: 'Rebooting the universe, please log off. ' 11) Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue. 12) BREAKFAST. SYS halted. . . Cereal port not responding. 13) COFFEE. SYS missing. . . Insert cup and press any key. 14) CONGRESS. SYS corrupted. . . Re-boot Washington D. C? (Y/N) 15) File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N) 16) Bad or missing mouse driver. Spank the cat? (Y/N) 17) Runtime Error 6D at 417A:32CF: Incompetent User. 18) Error reading FAT record: Try the SKINNY one? (Y/N) 19) WinErr 547: LPT1 not found. . . Use backup. . . PENCIL & PAPER. 20) User Error: Replace user. 21) Windows VirusScan1. 0 - 'OS/2 found: Remove it? (Y/Y)' 22) Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (P)anic.
= = = = = = = = = =
Beauty Joke
Girlfriend: Will you love me when I'm old and fat and ugly? Boyfriend: Of course I do !
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
|
| |
|
