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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of really funny video clips and other funny jokes |
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Dumb Joke
Yo mamma is such a bad cook that even the cockroaches throw up!
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Bumper Stickers - 4
I took an IQ test and the results were negative.
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Practical Joke
Top Ten Least Popular Stephen King Novels10. 'The Man Who Died of Old Age'9. 'How Cujo Got His Groove Back'8. 'Here's Another One I Cranked Out In An Afternoon'7. 'Vacuumstarter'6. 'The Scary Windowless Corridor Next To The Oval Office'5. 'The Guy Who Accidentally Put Expired Milk In His Coffee --He Didn't Drink It, But What If He Did?'4. 'The Scariest Part of This Book Is My Picture On The Back Cover'3. 'Inside the Kitchen At Your Local T. G. I. Friday's'2. 'Hi I'm Your New Neighbor, Richard Simmons'1. 'Satan's Independent Prosecutor'
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Teeth Joke
What's the difference between a vampire with toothache and a rainstorm? One roars with pain and the other pours with rain.
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Simple Joke
Penalty for horse theft is death by hanging. It is considered an offense to shower naked. You are not allowed to break more than three dishes per day, or chip the edges of more than four cups and/or saucers. It is illegal to block any traveled wagon road. Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner. If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle. It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit. You may not fart in a public place after 6 P. M. on Thursdays. Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown. It is illegal to skateboard without a license. A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing. Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal. It is illegal to molest a Key deer. If caught one will be fined or will have to go to jail. It is against the city ordinance to hang your clothes outside on a clothesline. It it illegal to park a pick-up truck in your driveway or in front of your house on the street. This law is limited to only those who do not own the house. (Repealed 2000) Sec. 10-56. While intoxicated, under influence of narcotics, prohibited. It shall be unlawful for any person to swim or bathe in that portion of the Atlantic Ocean within the corporate limits of the city when under the influence of intoxicating liquor or narcotic drugs to the extent that his or her normal faculties are impaired. (Code '1955
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Joke for Speeches
A young lesbian goes to her gynecologist for her yearly pelvicexamination. She puts on the paper gown and awaits him to come intothe exam room. He instructs her to get up onto the table and placeher feet in the stirrups. As he is examining her she hears him saying 'mmmm. . . mmmhmmm'. Hecompletes the examination, instructs her to dress and then meet himin his office when she is done. In his office she asks him if there was anything unusual that heobserved during the exam because she could not help but hear hisnon-verbal comments. 'Oh, that' he says. ' I was just admiring you. You have the cleanestvaginal area that I have ever seen in all my years of practice. 'The young woman proudly smiled and replied, 'Why thank you! I have awoman come in twice a week and clean it!'
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Pensioner Joke
Two elderly women were staring at the numbers of the floors listed above the elevator door. When asked if they needed any assistance with something, one asked how they were going to be able to reach way up there to push the button for their floor.
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Rabbit Joke
Did you hear about the egg laden rabbit who jumps off bridges? He's the Easter Bungee!
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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