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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of policemen jokes and other funny jokes |
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Bumper Stickers - 7
The horn blows does the driver!
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Ethnic Joke - 2
Why do Scottsmen wear kilts?The sound of the zipper scares the sheep. Sent by Lou
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Politics Humor
At a government affair, the wives of four worldleaders are chatting about how people refer to apenis in their countries. The wife of Tony Blair says in England peoplecall it a gentleman, because it stands up whenwomen are entering. The wife of Boris Yeltsin says in Russia you callit a patriot, because you never know if it willhit you on the front or on the back side. The wife of Chirac says in France you call it acurtain, because it goes down after the act. With great resignation, the wife of Clinton saysin the USA you call it a rumor, because itgoes from mouth to mouth. . . Sent by Igor
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Frog Joke
What do you call a frog spy ? A croak and dagger agent !
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Worlds Best Joke
1. Leave the copy machine set to 99 copies, reduce 200%, extra dark, 17-inch paper. 2. In the memo field of all your checks write 'for sensual massage. '3. Specify that your drive-through order is 'to go. '4. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions 'to keep them tuned up. '5. Reply to everything someone says with 'that's what YOU think. '6. Finish all your sentences with the words 'in accordance with prophecy. '7. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears. 8. Staple papers in the middle of the page. 9. Ask people what gender they are. 10. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
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Free Adult Joke
The old spinster was rocking on her front porch with her tomcat at her feet, when a good fairy suddenly appeared before her and offered her three wishes. 'Aw, go on, ' the little old lady said in disbelief, 'if you can grant three wishes, let's see you turn this rocking chair into a pile of gold?'The good fairy waved her hand, and 'pouf', the rocking chair turned into a pile of pure gold. Her face lighting up, the lady said 'I really get two more wishes?''Yes', the good fairy assured her. 'Anything your heart desires. ''Then make me into a beautiful, voluptuous young woman. ' Another wave of her hand, and the wish was granted. 'Finally, make my faithful old cat into a tall, dark and handsome young man. 'The good fairy waved her hand and disappeared as the third wish came true, and a handsome muscular young man stood where the tomcat had just been sleeping. The young man approached the once-old lady, took her in his arms and murmured. . . 'Now, aren't you sorry you sent me to the vet?'
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Funniest Joke
Bill, Hillary and Chelsea Clinton are on Air Force One. Bill says to Hillary, 'I could make a lot of people very happy if I threw 1 million $1 bills out of this plane. 'Hillary says, 'Oh yeah, well I could make even more people happy if I threw 1 million $5 bills out of this plane. 'Chelsea says, 'I could make the whole world happy if I threw you both out of this plane!'
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Elephant Joke
How do you know that peanuts are fattening ? Have you ever seen a skinny elephant ?
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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