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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of pink fun house and other funny jokes |
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Law Joke
Q: Did you hear about the new microwave lawyer?
A: You spend eight minutes in his office and get billed as if you'd been there eight hours.
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Medical Joke
Howard had felt guilty all day long. No matter how much he tried to forget about it, he couldn't. The guilt and sense of betrayal was overwhelming. But every once in a while he'd hear that small inner voice trying to reassure him, 'Howard. Don't worry about it. You aren't the first doctor to sleep with one of your patients and you won't be the last. ' But invariably the other voice would bring him back to reality, 'Howard. You're a veterinarian. '
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Dog Joke - 1
How did the Chihuahua disappear on the road? It was using a hide-'n-go-seekle!
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Science Joke
A worried patient went to his psychiatrist. 'I'm in love with my horse, ' he said. 'But that's nothing, ' replied the shrink. 'A lot of people love animals. For instance, my wife and I have a dog that we love very much. ''Ah, but doctor, ' the patient replied. 'It's a sexual attraction that I feel toward my horse. ''Ahhh!' exclaimed the doc. 'What kind of a horse is it? Male or female?''Female, of course, ' said the bloke. 'What do you think I am, a faggot!'
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Humor Joke
Clown: Why are you wearing such a large shirt? Second Clown: I always perform in the big top.
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Strange Humor
20 Reasons Why Chocolate Is Better Than Sex!1. You can GET chocolate. 2. 'If you love me you'll swallow that' has real meaning with chocolate. 3. Chocolate satisfies even when it has gone soft. 4. You can safely have chocolate while you are driving. 5. You can make chocolate last as long as you want it to. 6. You can have chocolate even in front of your mother. 7. If you bite the nuts too hard the chocolate won't mind. 8. Two people of the same sex can have chocolate without being called nasty names. 9. The word 'commitment' doesn't scare off chocolate. 10. You can have chocolate on top of your desk during working hours without upsetting your co-workers. 11. You can ask a stranger for chocolate without getting your face slapped. 12. You don't get hairs in your mouth with chocolate. 13. With chocolate there's no need to fake it. 14. Chocolate doesn't make you pregnant. 15. You can have chocolate at any time of the month. 16. Good chocolate is easy to find. 17. You can have as many kinds of chocolate as you can handle. 18. You are never too young or too old for chocolate. 19. When you have chocolate it does not keep your neighbors awake. 20. With chocolate size doesn't matter.
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Joke for Halloween
A man joins a big corporate empire as a trainee. On his very first day of work, he dials the pantry and shouts into the phone - 'Get me a coffee, quickly!'The voice from the other side responded, 'You fool you've dialed the wrong extension! Do you know who you're talking to, dumbo?''No, ' replied the trainee. 'It's the CEO of the company, you fool!'The trainee shouts back, 'And do YOU know who YOU are talking to, you fool?!''No. ' replied the CEO indignantly. 'Good!' replied the trainee, and puts down the phone.
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Stand Up Joke
From David Letterman - Tuesday, January '31
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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