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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of opus comedy lounge and other funny jokes |
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Birthday Joke
Artificial intelligence is a wonderful thing. I told my computer that today is my birthday, and it said that I needed an upgrade.
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Bumper Stickers - 3
Have you bitch slapped an environmentalist today?
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Knock Knock Joke - 1
Knock Knock Who's there ! Acis ! Acis who ? Acis spades !
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Dirty Joke
A man walks into a tattoo parlor and says he would like a $100 dollar bill on his dick. Well the tattoo artist laughs and says 'I'll do it for free if you can give me one good reason for it. ' The guy thinks for a second and says. 'Well one, I like to keep my money in my pants, two I like to watch my money grow, and three I want to see how fast my wife can blow a $100.
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Animal World
A double whammy:Why do elephants paint thier testicles red?So they can hide in cherry trees. What's the loudest noise in the jungle?A Monkey eating cherries.
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Ethnic Joke - 1
Paddy was trapped in a bog and seemed a goner when Big Mick O'Reilly wandered by. 'Help!' Paddy shouted, 'OI'm sinkin'!' Don't worry, ' assured Mick. 'Next to the Strong Muldoon, OI'm the strongest man in Erin, and OI'll pull ye right out o' there. ' Mick leaned out and grabbed Paddy's hand and pulled and pulled to no avail. After two more unsuccessful attempts, Mick said to Paddy, 'Shure, an' Oi can't do it. The Strong Muldoon could do it alone, mebbe, but OI'll have to get some help. ' As Mick was leaving, Paddy called 'Mick! Mick! D'ye think it will help if Oi pull me feet out of the stirrups?'
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Kids School Joke
What do you get if you cross a glow worm with a python?A 15 foot strip light that can strangle you to death!
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Dog Joke - 2
What is brown and gray, has eight legs, and is carrying a large trunk and a small trunk?
A Chihuahua on vacation with an elephant.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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