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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of oil clean up and other funny jokes |
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Joke for Kids
One day a guy went to a grocery store and the bagger boy asked him 'Paperor Plastic' and the man said, 'Uh. . . paper I guess. 'Then the bagger boy said your total is $56. 35. The man took out his wallet and said 'Real or Counterfeit'.
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Fun Funny Joke
Once I was sick and I had to go to an ear, nose, and throat man to get well. There are ear doctors, nose doctors, throat doctors, gynecologists, proctologists, any place you got a hole, there's a guy who specializes in your hole. They make an entire career out of that hole. And if the ear doctor, nose doctor, throat doctor, gynecologist, or proctologist can't help you, he sends you to a surgeon. Why? So he can make a new hole!
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Barbie doll Joke
There is a new Barbie doll on the market - LAPD Barbie . . . comes with two nightsticks, in case one gets broken subduing a suspect. Taser also available.
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Best Joke
Sid and Al were sitting in a Chinese restaurant. 'Sid, ' asked Al, 'are there any Jews in China?''I don't know, ' Sid replied. 'Why don't we ask the waiter?'When the waiter came by, Al asked him, 'Are there any Chinese Jews?''I don't know sir, let me ask, ' the waiter replied, and he went into the kitchen. He returned in a few minutes and said, 'No, sir. No Chinese Jews. ''Are you sure?' Al asked. 'I will check again, sir. ' the waiter replied and went back to the kitchen. While he was still gone, Sid said, 'I cannot believe there are no Jews in China. Our people are scattered everywhere. 'When the waiter returned he said, 'Sir, no Chinese Jews. ''Are you really sure?' Al asked again. 'I cannot believe there are no Chinese Jews. ''Sir, I ask everyone, ' the waiter replied exasperated. 'We have orange Jews, prune Jews, tomato Jews and grape Jews, but no one ever hear of Chinese Jews!'
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Computer Joke
A technician advised his customer to put his troubled floppy back in the drive and close the door. The customer put the disk in, asked the tech to hold on, and was heard putting the phone down, getting up and closing the door to his room.
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Redneck Joke
Your richest relative buys a new house and you have to help take the wheels off of it.
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Weird Women Joke
A young woman on a rough Atlantic crossing was in her cabin undressing then suddenly she was overcome by sea sickness. In a panic she rushed into the corridor and headed for the bathroom. It was not until she collided with an elderly gentleman that she realized she didn't have a stitch of clothing on. Horrified, she let out a shriek. Her fellow sufferer looked at her sadly. 'Don't let it bother you, miss, ' he moaned. 'I'll never live to tell anyone. '
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Humor Joke
How do you change a dishwasher into a snow blower? Give her a shovel!
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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