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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of molecules with silly names and other funny jokes |
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Mom and Dad Joke
You automatically double-knot everything you tie. You find yourself humming the Barney song as you do the dishes. You hear a baby cry in the grocery store, and you start to gently sway back and forth, back and forth. However, your children are at school! You actually start to like the smell of strained carrots mixed with applesauce. You weep through the scene in Dumbo when his mom is taken away, not to mention what Bambi does to you. You get soooo into crafts you contemplate writing a book called 101 Fun Crafts to do with Dryer Lint and Eggshells. You spend a half hour searching for your sunglasses only to have your teenager say, 'Mom, why don't you wear the ones you pushed up on your head?' You are out for a nice romantic meal with your husband, enjoying some real adult conversation, when suddenly you realize that you've reached over and started to cut up his steak!
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College Humor
Why do women live longer than men?Someone has to stick around and clean up after them.
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Barbie doll Joke
There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Shock Therapy Barbie . . . car battery and wires included
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Bumper Stickers - 7
Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear.
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Knock Knock Joke - 3
Knock Knock!
Who's there?
One shoe
One shoe who?
One shoe come home, Bill Bailey? One shoe come home?
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Sports Humor
Weight ControlHere's the guide to calorie-burning activities and the number of calories perhour they consume. Beating around the bush. . . . . . . . . 75Jumping to conclusions . . . . . . . . 100Climbing the walls . . . . . . . . . . 150Swallowing your pride. . . . . . . . . . 50Passing the buck . . . . . . . . . . . . 25Throwing your weight around (depending on your weight). . . . 50-300Dragging your heels. . . . . . . . . . 100Pushing your luck. . . . . . . . . . . 250Making mountains out of molehills. . . 500Hitting the nail on the head . . . . . . 50Wading through paperwork . . . . . . . 300Bending over backwards . . . . . . . . 75Jumping on the bandwagon . . . . . . . 200Balancing the books. . . . . . . . . . . 25Running around in circles. . . . . . . 350Eating crow. . . . . . . . . . . . . . 225Tooting your own horn. . . . . . . . . . 25Climbing the ladder of success . . . . 750Pulling out the stops. . . . . . . . . . 75Adding fuel to the fire. . . . . . . . 160Wrapping it up at the day's end. . . . . 12To which you may want to add your own favorite activities, including:Opening a can of worms . . . . . . . . . 50Putting your foot in your mouth. . . . 300Starting the ball rolling. . . . . . . . 90Going over the edge. . . . . . . . . . . 25Picking up the pieces after. . . . . . 350
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Aardvark Joke
Why do aardvarks like to talk to ants? They can stick to the subject!
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Bumper Stickers - 4
I Work Hard Because Millions On Welfare Depend On Me
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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