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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of miss sixty killing joke and other funny jokes |
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Blonde Joke - 1
A blonde comes home from a day of shopping and discovers that her house is on fire, so she calls the fire department on her cell phone. 'Please state the nature of your emergency, ' says the operator. 'Help! My house is on fire!' the blonde replies. 'Okay, where do you live?' 'In a house you silly billy!' the blonde replies. 'No, no! How do we get there?' the operator asks fustratedly. 'Duh! Big Red Truck!!'
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Redneck Joke
Q: What is the last thing each Tickle Me Elmo doll receives before he leaves the factory? A: Two Test Tickles
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Bumper Stickers - 7
Whatever!
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Dumb People Joke
TWO TAMPONS WERE CROSSING THE STREET. THEY SEE A FRIEND. WHICH ONE WAVES?NEITHER, THEY ARE BOTH STUCK UP CUNTS.
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School Joke
1. Announce that the entire 32-volume Encyclopedia Britannica will be required reading for your class. Assign a report on Volume 1, Aardvark through Armenia, for next class.
2. Play 'Kumbaya' on the banjo.
3. Have a band waiting in the corner of the room. When anyone asks a question, have the band start playing and sing an Elvis song.
4. Ask occassional questions, but mutter 'as if you gibbering simps would know' and move on before anyone can answer.
5. Mention in passing that you're wearing rubber underwear.
6. Show a video on medieval torture implements to your calculus class. Giggle throughout it.
7. Announce 'you'll need this', and write the suicide prevention hotline number on the board.
8. Ask the class to read Jenkins through Johnson of the local phone book by the next lecture. Vaguely imply that there will be a quiz.
9. Have one of your graduate students sprinkle flower petals ahead of you as you pace back and forth.
10. Turn off the lights, play a tape of crickets chirping, and begin singing spirituals.
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Cat Joke
Law of Dinner Table Attendance
Cats must attend all meals when anything good is served.
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Law Joke
Q: Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?
A: If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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Judge Joke
When is an English teacher like a judge? When she hands out long sentences.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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