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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of michigan sucks jokes and other funny jokes |
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Assorted Joke
Student: Can I use the bathroom?Teacher: Okay but first say your ABC's. Students: ABCDEFGHIJKLMNO QRSTUVWXYZTeacher: Where's the P?Student: Its running down my leg!
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Totally Weird Joke
A fresh-faced lad on the eve of his wedding night goes to his mother with the following question: 'Mom, why are wedding dresses white?'The mother looks at her son and replies, 'Son, this shows the town that your bride is pure. 'The son thanks his mom and goes off to double-check this with his father. 'Dad why are wedding dresses white?'The father looks at his son in surprise and says. . . 'Son, all household appliances come in white!'
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Just for Laughs Joke
On opening his new store, a man received a bouquet of flowers. He became dismayed on reading the enclosed card, that it expressed 'Deepest Sympathy'. While puzzling over the message, his telephone rang. It was the florist, apologizing for having sent the wrong card. 'Oh, it's alright. ' said the storekeeper. 'I'm a businessman and I understand how these things can happen. ''But, ' added the florist, 'I accidentally sent your card to a funeral party. ' 'Well, what did it say?' ask the storekeeper. ''Congratulations on your new location'. ' was the reply.
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Animal Joke
A pair of chickens walk up to the circulation desk at a public library and say, 'Buk Buk BUK. ' The librarian decides that the chickens desire three books, and gives it to them. . . and the chickens leave shortly thereafter. Around midday, the two chickens return to the circulation desk quite vexed and say, ' Buk Buk BuKKOOK!' The librarian decides that the chickens desire another three books and gives it to them. The chickens leave as before. The two chickens return to the library in the early afternoon, approach the librarian, looking very annoyed and say, 'Buk Buk Buk Buk Bukkooook!' The librarian is now a little suspicious of these chickens. She gives them what they request, and decides to follow them. She followed them out of the library, out of the town, and to a park. At this point, she hid behind a tree, not wanting to be seen. She saw the two chickens throwing the books at a frog in a pond, to which the frog was saying, 'Rrredit Rrredit Rrredit. . . '
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Clinton Joke
Q: How did Bill and Hillary Clinton meet? A: They were dating the same girl in high school.
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Weird Women Joke
How is a woman like an airplane? -Both have cockpits.
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Politics Humor
Finally, Serbian hackers hacked the navigation systems of 'Tomahawk' missiles -- now they're called 'Boomerang. '
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Funny College Joke
A Mississippi professor was at a party and became indignant when asked if college professors were absent-minded. 'Professors haven't got bad memories, ' he declared. 'They're not absent-minded. Don't you think I know where I am right now, and don't you think tomorrow I'll know where I was last night? Would somebody like to ask me another question?' 'Yes, ' said another guest. 'Is it true that professors are absent-minded and have bad memories?' 'Good!' said the professor. 'I knew sooner or later somebody would ask me that question. '
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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