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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of mansfield fun run and other funny jokes |
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Bumper Stickers - 7
Yea, though I walk through the valley of death, I will fear no evil, for I am the meanest son of a bitch in the valley.
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Military Joke
Colin Powell, once USA's highest ranking military officer, (now Secretary of State), loves to relate this incident from his Vietnam days. It shows the importance of clear objectives. Finding an outpost at a very vulnerable spot, Powell decided to investigate why it was location was chosen. He was assured that it was a very important outpost. 'What's it's mission?' ' To protect the airfield!' 'What's the airfield here for?' 'To resupply the outpost!'
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Book title Joke
The Naughty Schoolboy by Enid Spanking
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Horse Joke
Did you hear about the overweight man who took up horse riding as exercise? The horse lost 15 pounds in a week!
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Joke for Speeches
Knock Knock Who's there? Agatha! Agatha who? Agatha headache. Do you have an aspirin? Knock Knock Who's there? Agnes! Agnes who? Agnes, Topeka, and the Santa Fe! Knock Knock Who's there? Alfred! Alfred who! Alfred the needle if you sew! Knock Knock Who's there? Ali! Ali who? Ali, Ali oxen free! Knock Knock Who's there? Alice! Alice who? I'm Alice chasing rainbows. . . . !
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Yo momma Joke
your momma so stupid she got locked in a groceiry store and starved.
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Heaven and hell Joke
A famous professor of surgery died and went to heaven. At the pearly gate he was asked by the gatekeeper: 'Have you ever committed a sin you truly regret?' 'Yes, ' the professor ansvered. 'When I was a young candidate at the hospital of Saint Lucas, we played soccer against at team from the Community Hospital, and I scored a goal, which was off-side. But the referee did not se it so, and the goal won us the match. I regret that now. ' 'Well, ' said the gatekeeper. 'That is a very minor sin. You may enter. ' 'Thank you very much, Saint Peter, ' the professor ansvered. 'Im am not Saint Peter, ' said the gatekeeper. 'He is having his lunchbreak. I am Saint Lucas. '
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Military Joke
A ranger outfit was having training in mountain climbing. One of the men slipped and began falling into a precipice. 'Are you hurt?' asked another. 'I don't know yet, ' a weak voice was heard, 'am still falling!'
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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