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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of little tikes sand and water fun factory and other funny jokes |
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Very Silly Joke
Q. Why don't witches like to ride their brooms when they're angry?A. They're afraid of flying off the handle!Q. Where do baby ghosts go during the day?A. Dayscare centers. Q. Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?A. His ghoul friend. Q. What do ghosts serve for dessert?A. I Scream. Q. What do witches put on their hair?A. Scare spray. Q. What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?A. Bamboo. Q. What kind of mistakes do spooks make?A. Boo boos. Q. Why couldn't Dracula's wife get to sleep?A. Because of his coffin. Q. Why do mummies make excellent spies?A. They're good at keeping things under wraps. Q. Why wasn't there any food left after the monster party?A. Because everyone was a goblin!Q. How did the ghost patch his sheet?A. With a pumpkin patch. Q. What is as sharp as a vampires fang?A. His other fang.
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E-mail Joke
How do writers send e-mail? On the Inkernet.
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School Joke
You have five minutes to get dressed before leaving for a hot date. You suddenly realize you don’t have any clean socks. You:
a. Rummage through the dirty laundry, sniffing each sock until finding two that don’t make your eyes water.
b. Cover your ankles with black shoe polish.
c. Tell your date you always wished you were old enough to select your own wardrobe when Miami Vice was all the rage.
d. Arrive for your date wearing nothing but an old sheet and claiming you thought tonight was the big toga party
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Law Enforcement Joke
A state trooper pulls over a car on a lonely back road and approaches the driver. 'Sir, is there a reason you're weaving all over the road?'
The driver replies, 'Oh officer, thank goodness you're here! I almost had an accident. I looked up and there was a tree right in front of me. I swerved to the left and there was another tree in front of me. I swerved to the right and there was another tree in front of me!'
Reaching through the side window to the rearview mirror, the officer says, 'Sir, that's your air freshener. '
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Ethnic Joke - 1
Q: How many Iranians does it take to change a light bulb? A: One hundred - One to screw it in and 99 to hold the house hostage.
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Celebrities Joke
Lady Di is welcomed at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter. Peter asks: 'Oh dear, what happened to you?' Di answers: 'I died in a car crash, but wait till you see my friend, he looks much worse'. Half an hour later Dodi shows up and St. Peter says: 'My God, you look terrible. 'Dodi replies: 'This is nothing. Wait till you see my driver. 'Half an hour later some bones and flesh move slowly to the Gates, and St. Peter says: 'So you're the driver?''No, I'm Mother Theresa.
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Dumb Joke
Q. -Why'd the chicken cross the road? A. - He was attached to Dennis Rodman's head!
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Politics Humor
At a U. N. meeting the American ambassador turned to the Japanese ambassador and whispered, 'When was your last election?' The Japanese ambassador turned bright red and whispered back, 'before bleakfast. '
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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