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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of lazy town fun and games and other funny jokes |
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Bizarre Joke
How do some men avoid making a wrong career move?They never get a job!
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Funny Famous Joke
A woman's husband has died. After a few months, she decides she wants a new one. She submits a classified ad as follows:'Widow looking for a new husband. To be considered, you must conform to these three criteria:1 - You can't beat me (as my first husband did). 2 - You can't run around on me (as my first husband did). 3 - You MUST be good in bed (as my first husband wasn't). 'A few days later, the doorbell rings. She opens the door and a man without any arms and or legs is sitting in a wheel chair. 'Can I help you?' she says. 'I'm here about your ad in the paper. ''Which ad is that?''The one looking for a husband. 'She says, 'Uhm, well, there were certain criteria. . . ''Yes, I know. Obviously, I could never beat you. . . I have no arms. ''Well, yes, I see that. . . but there were other criteria. ''And, as you can see, I could never run around on you. . . I have no legs. ''Well, yes, that's true. . . but there was one other thing that is very important. . . ''Ah, yes, well. . . how do you think I rang the door bell?'
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Ethnic Joke - 1
Did you hear about the tramp who walked up to the Jewish mother on the street and said, 'Lady, - I haven't eaten in three days. ' 'Force yourself' she replied.
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Dog Joke - 2
Why did the poor dog chase his own tail ?
He was trying to make both ends meet !
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Bumper Stickers - 7
When I die bury me upside down so the world can kiss my ass.
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Weather Joke
Why did the lady go out doors with her purse open? Because she expected some change in the weather.
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Science Joke
Safest Way to Drive Peter Ludwig, a caver from Austria who is appalled by American drivinghabits, offers the following advice:The probability of being involved in a traffic accident is directlyproportional to time spent on the road. Driving fast decreases one'sexposure. One third of traffic accidents are caused by drunk drivers; two thirdsare caused by non-drunk drivers. Therefore, the safest way to drive is drunk and VERY fast.
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Kids School Joke
Which fly makes films?Stephen Speilbug!
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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