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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of kurdish funny and other funny jokes |
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School Joke for Kids
VERBS:to schmooze = befriend scumto pitch = grovel shamelesslyto brainstorm = feign preparednessto research = procrastinate indefinitelyto network = spread disinformationto collaborate = argue incessantlyto freelance = collect unemploymentNOUNS:agent = frustrated lawyerlawyer = frustrated producerproducer = frustrated writerwriter = frustrated directordirector = frustrated actoractor = frustrated humanCOMPOUND WORDS:high-concept = low browproduction value = goreentry-level = pays nothinghighly qualified = knows the producernetwork approved = had made them moneyFINANCIAL TERMS:net = something that apparently doesn't existgross = Michael Eisner's salaryback-end = you, if you think you'll ever see itresiduals = braces for the kidsdeferral = don't hold your breathpoints = see 'net' or 'back-end'COMMON PHRASES:You can trust me = You must be newIt needs some polishing = Change everythingIt shows promise = It stinks rottenIt needs some fine tuning = Change everythingI'd like some input = I want total controlIt needs some honing = Change everythingCall me back next week = Stay out of my lifeIt needs some tightening = Change everythingTry and punch it up = I have no idea what I wantIt needs some streamlining = Change everythingYou'll never work in this town again = I have no power whatsoever
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Letter Joke
What word allows you to take away two letters and get one? Stone.
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Dumb People Joke
A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing 'Love' stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them. His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing. The man says 'I'm sending out '1
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Time Joke
Why did the kid put his clock in the oven. He wanted to have a hot time.
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Insect Joke
What goes 'snap, crackle and pop' ? A firefly with a short circuit !
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Insect Joke
What do you call A Tale of Two Mosquitoes? A bite-time story.
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Easy to Remember Joke
A couple were going out for the evening. They'd got ready, all dolled up, cat put out, etc. The taxi arrives, and as the couple got out, the cat shoots back in. They don't want the cat shut in the house, so the wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes upstairs to chase the cat out. The wife, not wanting it known that the house will be empty explains to the taxi driver 'He's just going upstairs to say goodbye to my mother. ' A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab -'Sorry I took so long' he says, 'Stupid old thing was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out!'
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Relationships Joke
A woman and her lover are on the bed in the woman's home, whenall of a sudden, they hear the front door open and close. 'Oh, no, it's my husband!'The man says, 'Where's your back door?''We don't have a back door' says the woman. The man then asks, 'Well, where do you want a back door?'
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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