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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of killing joke hosannas and other funny jokes |
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Warped Humor Joke
Why is the Liberty Bell like a dropped Easter egg? Because they're both cracked!
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Lawyer Joke
NASA was interviewing professionals to be sent to Mars. Only one could go and couldn?t return to Earth. The first applicant, an engineer, was asked how much he wanted to be paid for going. 'A million dollars, ' he answered, 'because I want to donate it to M. I. T. 'The next applicant, a doctor, was asked the same question. He asked for $2 million. 'I want to give a million to my family, ' he explained, 'and leave the other million for the advancement of medical research. 'The last applicant was a lawyer. When asked how much money he wanted, he whispered in the interviewer?s ear, 'Three million dollars. ''Why so much more than the others?' asked the interviewer. The lawyer replied, 'If you give me $3 million, I?ll give you $1 million, I?ll keep $1 million, and we?ll send the engineer to Mars. '
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Men Joke
Men are like coolers. Load them with beer and you can take them anywhere.
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Relationships Joke
Two men were changing in the locker room after a game of tennis. One notices the other one is putting on pair of stockings and suspenders. He says 'When did you start wearing them?' To which the other man replies 'Since my wife found a pair on the back seat of the car. '
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Fishing Joke
An old lady saw a little boy with a fishing-rod over his shoulder and a jar of tadpoles in his hand walking through the park one Sunday. 'Little boy, ' she called, 'don't you know you shouldn't go fishing on a Sunday?' 'I'm not going fishing, ma'am, ' he called back, 'I'm going home. '
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Legal Humor
Do you know the problem with lawyer jokes?Lawyers don't think they're funny, and the rest of us don'tthink they're jokes!
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Vampire Joke
What do you think of Dracula films? Fangtastic!
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Funny Kids Joke
Q: What kind of meat do you give a stupid dog?A: Chump chops!Q: How many seasons are there in a dogs life?A: Just one, the moulting season!Q: What do you call a dog with no legs?A: It doesn't matter what you call him, he still won't come!Q: Why is it called a 'litter' of puppies?A: Because they mess up the whole house!Q: How do you stop a dog smelling?A: Put a peg on it's nose!Q: What is the best time to take a Rottweiler for a walk?A: Any times he wants to!Q: When is a black dog not a black dog?A: When it's a greyhound!Q: How do you feel if you cross a sheepdog with a melon?A: Melon-collie!Q: What do you get if cross two young dogs with a pair of headphones?A: Hush puppies!Q: What do you call a litter of young dogs who have come in from the snow?A: Slush puppies!
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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