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injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of jokes to play on friends and other funny jokes |
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Sports Humor
When the old golfer died, Peter met him at the gates of heaven. 'Sorry, old man, ' Peter said, 'But I can't let you in. You seethe big book here says you committed one unpardonable sin backin 1978 -- You took the Lord's name in vain during a golf game. ' 'Oh, yes. I'll never forget that one, and I'm terribly sorryPeter, but I can explain. . . ', the old golfer blithered. 'Well, ' said Peter, 'You'll have to take it up with The Big Guy. ' So Peter led the old golfer down a long golden hallway, to God'soffice. 'We've got another code 6 here, sir! Says he can explain. . . ' 'So, ' booms God, 'You've been taking my name in vain. ' 'Only once, your Almighty, Sir. But I can explain!' 'OK. Try me, ' replied the Lord. 'Well you see sir, I was playing my best game of golf ever, andI made it to the 18th hole, and I'd win the tournament if I couldjust make par on this hole. I made my shot from the tee, and itwas sailing beautifully, when suddenly the wind shifted, and tookmy ball off into the woods, and right behind this enormous oak tree. . . ' 'And that's when you took my name in vain?' 'Oh, no, sir! I just took out my 6 iron and knocked that ballclear out of the woods with one swing! It was gliding beautifullytoward the green, when suddenly it lost speed, and dropped intoa sand trap, right smack in the middle of a deep hole. . . ' 'So, that is when you took my name in vain?' 'No, not then. I just took out my nine, and with one swing, drovethat ball right onto the green, and it rolled within two inchesof the hole. . . ' 'Don't tell me you missed a goddamn two inch putt!'
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Knock Knock Joke - 2
Knock Knock Who's there ! Amour ! Amour who? Amour you eat, the more you want !
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Doctor and nurse Joke
Patient: Doctor, what should I do if my temperature goes up five more points? Doctor: Sell!
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Mental health Joke
What do Psychologists say to each other when they meet?' 'You're fine, how am I? '
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Love and Marriage Joke
Good News, Bad News, Worse News IIGood: Your son studies a lot in his room Bad: You find several porn movies hidden there Worse: You're in them
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Music Joke
Q: Which positions does a violist use? A: First, third, and emergency.
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Bird Joke
What did the parrot say when he was using the Internet? P. Cs of eight, P. Cs of eight.
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Ethnic Joke - 2
What did the Eskimo schoolboy say to the Eskimo schoolgirl? What's an ice girl like you doing in a place like this?
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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