|
|
|
The
Best Humor Sites on the Internet |
|
Christmas Jokes
Funny Jokes Online
MOCKERY
Ghost Pictures
Ghost Stories
Hilarious Horoscopes
Bizarre Webcam
notMENSA
society for the stupid
Cheap posters
Raunchiest Riddles
Worst Jobs in the World
Love Poems
Inspirational Poems
Funny Poems
Famous Poems
Free Diet Plans
Top Paying
Keywords
Keyword Suggestions
Everything you want to know about everything!
Weird eBay
mesothelioma types
Top 100 Baby Names
flowers online
Poker Articles
Free View Webcams
Work from Home
World History
Baby Name Chooser
Text Links
Online Advertising
Flowers
Top searches
Weird Website
Children's Books
Scottish Jokes
Robert Burns Poems
Midge Jokes
Fathers Jokes
Funny Jokes
Love Quotes
Famous Quotes
Inspirational Quotes
Funny Quotes
Movie Quotes
Friendship Quotes
Get Found
anime girls
5QS |
|
|
No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
| |
|
|
Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
|
|
|
|
|
|
Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
|
|
|
Archive of joke wigs and other funny jokes |
|
School Joke for Kids
A neutron goes into a bar and asks the bartender, 'How much for abeer?'The bartender replies, 'For you, no charge. '
= = = = = = = = = =
Christmas Joke - 1
10. Boy, if I had not recently shot up four sizes, that would've fit. 9. It would be a shame if the garbage man ever accidentally took this from me. 8. Perfect for wearing in the basement. 7. Well, well, well. . . 6. I really don't deserve this. 5. Gosh, I hope this never catches fire! 4. I Love it, but I fear the jealousy it will inspire. 3. If the dog buries it, I'll be furious! 2. Sadly, tomorrow I enter the federal witness protection program. 1. To think I got this the year I vowed to give all my gifts to charity.
= = = = = = = = = =
Music Joke
Q: Why do so many fishermen own banjos? A: They make great anchors!
= = = = = = = = = =
Pensioner Joke
An 80 year old couple were having problems remembering things, so they decided to go to their doctor to get checked out to make sure nothing was wrong with them. When they arrived at the doctor's, they explained to the doctor about the problems they were having with their memory. After checking the couple out, the doctor tells them that they were physically okay but might want to start writing things down and make notes to help them remember things. The couple thanked the doctor and left. Later that night while watching TV, the old man got up from his chair and his wife asks, 'Where are you going?' He replies, 'To the kitchen. ' She asks, 'Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?' He replies, 'Sure. ' She then asks him, 'Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?' He says, 'No, I can remember that. ' She then says, 'Well, I also would like some strawberries on top. You had better write that down cause I know you'll forget that. ' He says, 'I can remember that, you want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries. ' She replies, 'Well, I also would like whip cream on top. I know you will forget that so you better write it down. ' With irritation in his voice, he says, 'I don't need to write that down, I can remember that. ' He then fumes into the kitchen. After about 20 minutes he returns from the kitchen and hands her a plate of bacon and eggs. She stares at the plate for a moment and says, 'You forgot my toast. '
= = = = = = = = = =
Old People Joke
Worried because they hadn't heard anything for days from the widow in the neighboring apartment, Mrs. Silver said to her son, 'Timmy, would you go next door and see how old Mrs. Kirkland is?'A few minutes later, Timmy returned. 'Well, ' asked Mrs. Silver, 'is she all right?''She's fine, except that she's angry at you. ''At me?' the woman exclaimed. 'Whatever for?''She said 'It's none of your business how old she is, '' snickered Timmy.
= = = = = = = = = =
Government Humor
Some time ago Mr. Clinton was hosting a state dinner when at the last minute his regular cook took ill and they had to get a replacement at short notice. The fellow arrived and turned out to be a very grubby looking man named Jon. The President voiced his concerns to his chief of staff but was told that this was the best they could do at such short notice. Just before the meal, the President noticed the cook sticking his fingers in the soup to taste it and again he complained to the chief of staff about the cook, but he was told that this man was supposed to be a very good chef. The meal went okay but the President was sure that the soup tasted a little off, and by the time dessert came, he was starting to have stomach cramps and nausea. It was getting worse and worse till finally he had to excuse himself from the state dinner to look for the bathroom. Passing through the kitchen, he caught sight of the cook, Jon, scratching his rear end and this made him feel even worse. By now he was desperately ill with violent cramps and was so disorientated that he couldn't remember which door led to the bathroom. He was on the verge of passing out from the pain when he finally found a door that opened and as he undid his trousers and ran in, he realised to his horror that he had stumbled into Monica Lewinsky's office with his trousers around his knees. As he was just about to pass out, she bent over him and heard her president whisper in a barely audible voice, 'sack my cook'. And that is how the whole misunderstanding occurred.
= = = = = = = = = =
Blonde Joke - 3
Why did the blonde call the welfare office? She wanted to know how to cook food stamps!
= = = = = = = = = =
Horse Joke
What is a horses favourite kind of party? A stall ball.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
|
| |
|
