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bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of joke video every and other funny jokes |
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Bar Joke - 1
John and Jessica were on their way home from the bar one night and John got pulled over by the police. The officer told John that he was stopped because his tail light was burned out. John said, 'I'm very sorry officer, I didn't realize it was out, I'll get it fixed right away. '
Just then Jessica said, 'I knew this would happen when I told you two days ago to get that light fixed. '
So the officer asked for John's license and after looking at it said, 'Sir your license has expired. '
And again John apologized and mentioned that he didn't realize that it had expired and would take care of it first thing in the morning.
Jessica said, 'I told you a week ago that the state sent you a letter telling you that your license had expired. '
Well by this time, John is a bit upset with his wife contradicting him in front of the officer, and he said in a rather loud voice, 'Jessica, shut your mouth!' pr0perty0fgl0wp0rt
The officer then leaned over toward Jessica and asked. 'Does your husband always talk to you like that?'
Jessica replied, 'only when he's drunk. '
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Cow Joke
Cow: Why don't you shoo those flies? Bull: I'll let them go barefoot!
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Dumb Blonde Joke
How do you tell if a blonde did your landscaping?The bushes are darker than the rest of the yard.
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Miscellaneous Joke
Two friends were playing golf when one pulled out a cigar. He didn't have a lighter, so he asked his friend if he had one. 'I sure do, ' he replied while he reached into his golf bag and pulled out a 12 inch Bic lighter. 'Wow!' said his friend, 'Where did you get that monster lighter?' 'I got it from my genie. ' 'You have a genie?' 'Yes, right here in my golf bag. ' 'Could I see him?' He opens his golf bag and out pops a genie. The friend asks the genie, 'Since, I'm a good friend of your master, will you grant me one wish?' 'Yes I will' the genie replies. The friend asks the genie for a million bucks. The genie hops back into the golf bag and leaves him standing there, waiting for his million bucks. Suddenly, the sky begins to darken and the sound of a million ducks flying overhead is heard. The friend tells his golfing partner, 'I asked for a million bucks, not a million ducks!' He answers, 'I forgot to tell you that the genie is hard of hearing. Do you really think I asked him for a 12 inch Bic?'
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Science Joke
Two fags are on a picnic, and the first guy says, 'I have to take adumpski, 'and he walks into the woods to do it. Several minutes later, the other guy hears the first guy crying'Boo Hoo, I Had A Miscarriage. I Had A Miscarriage. ' He runs into the woods to see what is going on. When he gets there, the first guy is still crying, 'Boo-Hoo I Had AMiscarriage. . . He looks down and says, 'Don't be silly. You didn't have a miscarraige. Youhad diarrhea on a toad. '
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Barbie doll Joke
There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Trailer Park Barbie . . . for the parent who wants to show their child what grown-up life is really going to be like
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Joke for Kids
What's the disease that paralyzes blondes below the waist?A: Marriage.
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Dumb Joke
According to the Knight-Ridder News Service, the inscription on the metal bands used by the U. S. Department of the Interior to tag migratory birds has been changed. The bands used to bear the address of the Washington Biological Survey, abbreviated, 'Wash. Biol. Surv. ' until the agency received the following letter from an Arkansas camper: 'Dear Sirs: While camping last week I shot one of your birds. I think it was a crow. I followed the cooking instructions on the leg tag and I want to tell you it was horrible. '
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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