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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of joke shop manchester and other funny jokes |
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Medicine Joke
The patient shook his doctor's hand in gratitude and said:'Since we are the best of friends, I would not want to insultyou by offering payment. But I would like for you to know thatI had mentioned you in my will. ''That is very kind of you, ' said the doctor emotionally, andthen added, 'Can I see that prescription I just gave you? I'dlike to make a little change. . . '
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Funny Kids Joke
What squeaks as it solves crimes?Miami mice!
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Naughty Joke
The dean of women at an exclusive girl's college was lecturing her students on sexual morality. 'In moments of temptation, ' said the speaker to the class, 'ask yourself just one question: Is an hour of pleasure worth a lifetime of shame?'A sweet young thing in the back of the room rose to ask: 'How do you make it last an hour?'
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Ethnic Joke - 1
How come Mexico never has a good Olympic team? Because all of the mexicans that can run, jump, or swim are in the U. S.
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Elephant Joke
We're going to play elephants and circuses, ' said a little boy at kindergarten, 'Do you want to join in?' 'I'd love to, 'replied the teacher. 'What do you want me to do?' 'You can be the lady that feeds us peanuts !'
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Zodiac Joke
Q: How many Aquarians does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Well, you have to remember that everything is energy so. . .
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Christmas Joke - 1
Mail your packages early so that the post office can lose them in time for Christmas!-Johnny Carson
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Elderly People Joke
An old man is sitting on the park bench crying. Another oldman sits down next to him and says, 'Mister, what's theproblem?'The old man wipes the tears from his eyes and explains, 'I'vegot this beautiful, 35 year old wife, and all she wants to do ismake love from the moment I walk in the door till the momentwe go to sleep and then when we wake up again. ''So, what the hell is the problem?''Mister, you don't understand. . . I forgot where I live!'Another oldman sits down next to him and says, 'Mister, what's theproblem?'The old man wipes the tears from his eyes and explains, 'I'vegot this beautiful, 35 year old wife, and all she wants to do ismake love from the moment I walk in the door till the momentwe go to sleep and then when we wake up again. ''So, what the hell is the problem?''Mister, you don't understand. . . I forgot where I live!'
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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