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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of joke shop boston and other funny jokes |
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King Kong Joke
How can you mend King Kong's arm if he's twisted it? With a monkey wrench.
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Car and train Joke
A passenger train is creeping along, slowly. Finally it creaks to a halt. A passenger sees a conductor walking by outside. 'What's going on?' she yells out the window. 'Cow on the track!' replies the conductor. Ten minutes later, the train resumes its slow pace. Within five minutes, however, it stops again. The woman sees the same conductor walk again. She leans out the window and yells, 'What happened? Did we catch up with the cow again?'
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Knock Knock Joke - 2
Knock Knock Who's there ! Aries ! Aries who ? Aries a reason why I talk this way !
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Business Joke
A woman walks into a convenience store. She walks straight to the manager and asks, 'Do you have any small note-books?'
'Sorry,' says the manager. 'We're all out. '
The woman shrugs, and asks, 'Well, do you have any mechanical pencils?'
'Nope, don't have that either,' says the manager.
The woman feels her stomach rumbling and asks, 'Do you have Doritos? Nachos?'
The manager shrugs, 'Sorry. '
'Hmmph. How about Chapstick?' says the woman.
'Nope. Don't have that. '
'Wow!' the woman shouts, 'If you don't have anything, you should close the stupid store!'
The manager shrugs, 'Don't have the key. '
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Monster Joke
What happened to Frankenstein's stupid son? He had so much wax in his ears that he became a permanent contributor to Madame Tussaud's.
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Dirty Joke
Two elderly gentlemen, Sam and Harry, were having breakfast. Sam said to Harry, 'Harry, why do you have a suppository in your ear?' Harry took the suppository out, looked it over and said, 'Sam, I'm really glad you saw this thing, now I think I know where my hearing aid is. '
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Cop Joke
The local sheriff was looking for a deputy, so Gomer - who was not exactly the sharpest nail in the bucket went in to try out for the job. 'Okay, ' the sheriff drawled, 'Gomer, what is 1 and 1?''11' he replied. The sheriff thought to himself, 'That's not what I meant, but he's right. ''What two days of the weekstart with the letter 'T'?''Today and tomorrow. 'He was again surprised that Gomer supplied a correct answer that he had never thought of himself. 'Now Gomer, listen carefully: Who killed Abraham Lincoln?'Gomer looked a little surprised himself, then thought really hard for a minute and finally admitted, 'I don't know. ''Well, why don't you go home and work on that one for a while?'So, Gomer wandered over to the pool hall where his pals were waiting to hear the results of the interview. Gomer was exultant. 'It went great! First day on the job and I'm already working on a murder case!'
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Love and Marriage Joke
Young Actor: Dad, guess what? I've just got my first part in a play. I play the part of a man Who's been married for 30 years. Father: Well, keep at it, son. Maybe one day you'll get a speaking part.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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