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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of horrid practical jokes and other funny jokes |
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Accountant Joke
A business owner tells her friend that she is desperately searching for an accountant. Her friend asks, 'Didn't your company hire an accountant a short while ago?' The business owner replies, 'That's the accountant I've been searching for. '
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Marriage Joke
Hubby - You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Wife - When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
Hubby - You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Wife - Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, 'What other problem can there be greater than this one?'
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Joke for Kids
POLISH MEDICAL TERMNINOLOGY FOR THE LAYMANartery- the study of fine painting barium- what you do when the patient dies beneign - what you are after you are eight cesarean section- a district in Rome colic- a sheep dog congenital - friendly dilate - to live long fester - quicker G. I. series - baseball game between soldiers hangnail - coat hook medical staff - a doctors cane minor operation - coal digger morbid - a higher offer nitrate - lower than the day rate node - was aware of organic - church musician out-patient - a person who has fainted post-operative - a letter carrier protein - in favor of young people secretion - hiding anything serology - study of English knighthood tablet - a small table tumor - an extra pair urine - opposite of your out varicose veins - veins very close together
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Travel and tourist Joke
A travel agent looked up from his desk to see an older lady and an older gentleman peering in the shop window at the posters showing the glamorous destinations around the world. The agent had had a good week and the dejected couple looking in the window gave him a rare feeling of generosity. He called them into his shop and said, 'I know that on your pension you could never hope to have a holiday, so I am sending you off to a fabulous resort at my expense, and I won't take no for an answer. ' He took them inside and asked his secretary to write two flight tickets and book a room in a five star hotel. They, as can be expected, gladly accepted, and were on their way. About a month later the little lady came in to his shop. 'And how did you like your holiday?' he asked eagerly. 'The flight was exciting and the room was lovely, ' she said. 'I've come to thank you. But, one th ing puzzled me. Who was that old guy I had to share the room with?'
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Knock Knock Joke - 1
Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Accordion.
Accordion who?
Accordion to the weather forecast it's going to rain tomorrow.
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Free Adult Joke
A lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. To his dismay, there were thousands of people ahead of him in line to see St. Peter. But, to his surprise, St. Peter left his desk at the gate and came down the long line to where the lawyer was, and greeted him warmly. Then St. Peter and one of his assistants took the lawyer by the hands and guided him up to the front of the line, and into a comfortable chair by his desk. The lawyer said, 'I don't mind all this attention, but what makes me so special?'St. Peter replied, 'Well, I've added up all the hours for which you billed your clients, and by my calculation you must be about 193 years old!'
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Village Idiot Joke
Zack and Tybe, two Alabama farm boys, bought themselves a truckload of watermelons for a buck apiece. They sold each one for a dollar. After counting up their cash, they realized they'd wound up with the same amount of money they'd started out with. 'See!' said Tybe. 'Ah told yew we shoulda got a bigger truck!'
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Baby Joke
What did the mummy snake say to the crying baby snake? Stop crying and viper your nose.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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