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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of hilarious practical jokes and other funny jokes |
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Relationships Joke
A wealthy man sat in his attorney's office. 'Do you want the bad news first or the terrible news?'the lawyer asked. 'Give me the bad news first. ''Your wife found a picture worth a half-million dollars. ''That's the bad news?' the man asked incredulously. 'I can't wait to hear the terrible news. ''It's of you and your mistress. '
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At Work Joke
A truck driver who had been delivering radioactive waste for the local reactor begins to feel sick after a few years on the job. He decided to seek compensation for his ailment. Upon his arrival at the workers' compensation department, he is interviewed by an assessor. Assessor: I see you work with radio-active materials and wish to claim compensation. Trucker: Yeah, I feel really sick. Assessor: Alright then, Does your employer take measures to protect you from radiation poisoning? Trucker: Yeah, he gives me a lead suit to wear on the job. Assessor: And what about the cabin in which you drive? Trucker: Oh yeah. That's lead lined, all lead lined. Assessor: What about the waste itself? Where is that kept? Trucker: Oh, the stuff is held in a lead container, all lead. Assessor: Let me see if I get this straight. You wear a lead suit, sit in a lead-lined cabin and the radio-active waste is kept in a lead container. Trucker: Yeah, that?s right. All lead. Assessor: Then I can't see how you could claim against him for radiation poisoning. Trucker: I'm not. I claiming for lead poisoning.
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Clean Humor
Why did the Priest wear underwear in the shower?He didn't want to look down on the unemployed
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Mad Joke
A blonde went to the emergency room with the tip of her left index finger blown off. 'How did this happen?' the doctor asked. 'Well I was trying to commit suicide, ' the blonde replied. 'Trying to commit suicide by shooting your finger?''No silly! First I put the gun to my chest and I thought, 'I just paid $'6
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Cop Joke
A police detective was investigating a homicide. As he questioned the on-scene officer, he learned the body was that of a young woman.
The body was found with a bowl over her head and a spoon stuck in her back.
The on-scene officer asked what the detective thought had happened to the woman.
The detective responded, 'I think it's obvious. A cereal killer got her!'
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Vampire Joke
How does a vampire clean his house? With a victim cleaner.
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Silliest Joke
Patient: Please tell me, doctor, am I getting better? Doctor: I think so. But to be sure, let me feel your wallet. . .
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Waiter Joke
Customer: I didn't order this. Waiter: I know, but your meal tastes worse.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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