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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of golden wedding jokes and other funny jokes |
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College Humor
Why does a woman close her eyes when she's having sex?Because no woman ever wants to see a man enjoying himself!
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Miscellaneous Joke
Why are lawyers buried 12 feet deep instead of just six? Because deep down they really are good people.
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Religious Joke
O'Toole worked in the lumber yard for twenty years and all that time he'd been stealing the wood and selling it. At last his conscience began to bother him and he went to confession to repent. 'Father, it's 15 years since my last confession, and I've been stealing wood from the lumber yard all those years, ' he told the priest. 'I understand my son, ' says the priest. 'Can you make a Novena?' O'Toole said, 'Father, if you have the plans, I've got the lumber. '
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Music Joke
Q: Why is the banjo player a fiddle player's best friend? A: Without him, the fiddle would be the most hated instrument on earth.
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Brother and sister Joke
My sister wanted to marry a man clever enough to make a lot of money but dumb enough to spend it on her !
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Math Joke
Psychologists subject an engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician - a topologist, by the way - to an experiment: Each of them is locked in a room for a day - hungry, with a can of food, but without an opener; all they have is pencil and paper.
At the end of the day, the psychologists open the engineer's room first. Pencil and paper are unused, but the walls of the room are covered with dents. The engineer is sitting on the floor and eating from the open can: He threw it against the walls until it cracked open.
The physicist is next. The paper is covered with formulas, there is one dent in the wall, and the physicist is eating, too: He calculated how exactly to throw the can against the wall, so that it would crack open.
When the psychologists open the mathematician's room, the paper is also full of formulas, the can is still closed, and the mathematician has disappeared. But there are strange noises coming from inside the can. . .
Someone gets an opener and opens the can. The mathematician crawls out. 'Damn! I got a sign wrong. . . '
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Cow Joke
Q. What does a cow make when the sun comes out? A. A shadow
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Friendship Joke
A man is out shopping and discovers a new brand of Olympic condoms. Clearly impressed, he buys a pack. When he arrives home, he tellshis wife about the purchase he's just made. 'Olympic condoms?' she blurts, 'What makes them so special?''There are three colors, ' he explains, 'gold, silver and bronze. ''So what color are you gonna wear tonight?' she asks with a grin. 'Gold of course, ' says the proud man. The wife responds, 'Why don't you wear silver -- it would be niceif you came second for a change!'
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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