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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of godly jokes and other funny jokes |
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Law Joke
A surgeon, an architect an a lawyer are having a heated barroom discussion concerning which of their professions is actually the oldest profession.
The surgeon says: 'Surgery IS the oldest profession. God took a rib from Adam to create Eve and you can't go back further than that. '
The architect says: 'Hold on! In fact, God was the first architect when he created the world out of chaos in 7 days, and you can't go back any further than THAT!'
The lawyer puffs his cigar and says: 'Gentlemen, Gentlemen. . . who do you think created the CHAOS??!!'
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Kids Joke
Teacher: Little Johnny, go to the map and find North America. Little Johnny: Here it is!Teacher: Correct. Now, class, who discovered America?Class: Little Johnny!
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Joke of the Day
BANNED CHILDREN'S BOOKSDad's New Wife Timothy Pop! Goes the Hamster. . . and Other Great Microwave Games How to Become the Dominant Military Power In Your Elementary School Safe Sex and the Zip-Lock Bag Testing Homemade Parachutes With Nothing At All But Your Household Pets Egghead - and Other Things Mrs. Dumpty Gave Humpty The Complete Set Of 'Mother Got Goosed' Nursery Rhymes Peter Rabbit's Frisky Adventures The Hardy Boys, the Barbie Twins, and the Vice Squad The Tickling Babysitter Babar Meets the Taxidermist Controlling the Playground: Respect Through Fear Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence The Boy Who Died from Eating All His Vegetables Start a Real-Estate Empire With the Change From Mom's Purse The Pop-up Book of Human Anatomy Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will Let's Draw Betty and Veronica Without Their Clothes On The Care Bears Maul Some Campers and Are Shot Dead How to Insert Sharp Objects into Your Ear When is Later? The Beanie Babies and the Putrid Odor Why Mommy and Daddy Are Bouncing on the Bed Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs Get Kinky Rin Tin Tin Guards the Herd of Sheep How Far is Not Far? Three Men in a Tub - The Untold Story The Boy Who Cried 'Fire!' Things Rat Poison Looks Like Why Uncle Bud Falls Down Two Fingers in the Dike Back To School! A Munitions Primer Jack and Jill and Ted and Alice Things That Are Really Sharp How Dopey Got His Name Spinach or Steroids - A Guide to Scholarships
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Kids Fairy Tale Joke
Why is Ali Baba's baby like a small diamond?
Because they are both dear little things!
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Internet Joke
What do you call a ghost on the Internet? e-erie.
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Book title Joke
The Lost Bet by Henrietta Hart
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Aardvark Joke
What do you call an road construction aardvark? A tarredvark!
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Kids Puns
A doctor had the reputation of helping couples increase the joy in their sex life, but always promised not to take a case if he felt he could not help them. The Browns came to see the doctor, and he gave them thorough physical exams, psychological exams, and various tests and then concluded, 'Yes, I am happy to say that I believe I can help you. ''On your way home from my office stop at the grocery store and buy some grapes and some doughnuts. Go home, take off your clothes, and you, sir, roll the grapes across the floor until you make a bulls eye in your wife's love canal. Then on hands and knees you must crawl to her like a leopard and retrieve the grape using only your tongue. 'Then next, ma'am, you must take the doughnuts and from across the room, toss them at your husband until you make a ringer around his love pole. Then like a lioness, you must crawl to him and consume the doughnut. ' The couple went home and their sex life became more and more wonderful. They told their friends, Mr. & Mrs. Green that they should see the good doctor. The doctor greeted the Greens and said he would not take the case unless he felt that he could help them; so he conducted the physical exams and the same battery of tests. Then he told the Greens the bad news. 'I cannot help you, so I will not take your money. I believe your sex life is as good as it will ever be, I cannot help. 'The Greens pleaded with him, and said, 'You helped our friends the Browns, now please, please, help us. ''Well, all right', the doctor said. 'On your way home from the office, stop at the grocery store and buy some apples and a box of cheerios. . . '
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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