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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny wedding presents and other funny jokes |
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Love and Marriage Joke
Some people ask the secret of Anthony's long marriage. They take time to go to a restaurant two times a week: a little candlelight dinner, soft music, and a slow walk home. The Mrs. goes Tuesdays; He goes Fridays.
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Simple Joke
A man arrives at the gates of heaven. St. Peter asks, 'Religion?' The man says, 'Methodist. ' St. Peter looks down his list, and says, 'Go to room '24
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Kids Joke
Little Johnny was in class again. Teacher asked everyone 'Can anyone tell me a sentence with the word definitely in it?' Meg puts up her hand. 'The sky is definitely blue. ' 'Thats not bad, Meg, ' says the teacher, 'but the sky can be grey or red. ' Young Sally tried :'The grass is definitely green. ' 'Good try Sally, but grass can be yellow or brown too!' Suddenly Little Johnny's hand shoots up. 'Miss Brown does a fart have lumps?' The teacher was horrified. 'No of course not Johnny! What are you talking about?' So Johnny says, 'Well then Miss brown, I've definitely shit my pants!'
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Children Joke
A whole family was caught in a small boat during a sudden storm off the shores of Florida, but towed to safety in Fort Lauderdale by the ever alert U. S. Coast Guard. 'I always knew God would take care of us, ' said the composed five year old daughter of the boat owner after the family got home. 'I like to hear you say that, ' beamed the mother. 'Always remember that God is in His heaven watching over us. ' 'Oh, I wasn't talking about THAT God, ' the five year old interrupted. 'I was talking about the COAST God. '
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Totally Weird Joke
A rather senile old lady went to her doctor complaining of drainingand a feeling of fullness in her ear. After the examination, thedoctor initiated a conversation that went as follows:D: Why madam, I think you have a suppository in your ear. L: ?eh?D: Madam - You have a SUPPOSITORY in your EAR! L: ??EH??D: (shouting) --IN YOUR EAR! --A SUPPOSITORY!!! L: Oh, thankGoodness - now I know where I put my hearing aid!
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Bumper Stickers - 4
I can handle pain until it hurts.
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School Joke for Kids
The Geography of a Woman------------------------Between the ages of 18 - 21 a woman is like Africa or Australia. She is half discovered, half wild and naturally beautiful with bushland around the fertile deltas. Between the ages of 21 - 30 a woman is like America or Japan. Completely discovered, very well developed and open to trade especially with countries with cash or cars. Between the ages of 30 - '35
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Funniest Joke
A priest, a doctor, and an engineer were waiting one morning at thethird tee (par '3
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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