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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny wedding card messages and other funny jokes |
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Science Joke
New scientific theoriesHONORABLE MENTION: The quantity of consonants in the Englishlanguage is absolutely constant. If consonants are omitted in onegeographic area, they turn up in another. When a Bostonian 'pahks'his 'cah', the lost r's migrate southwest, causing a Texan to 'warsh'his car and invest in 'erl wells. '
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Movie and TV Joke
Q: How many Studio Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: We don't know. Light bulbs last longer than studio executives.
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At Work Joke
The Yuppette had risen to executive level in the company in no time at all. Hearing rumors about her, the husband confronted his wife and accused her of sleeping with all of the top level managers. 'Now that's entirely false. ' she cried. 'I took the easy route and slept with anyone who mattered at least twice. '
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Heaven and hell Joke
A religious man is on top of a roof during a great flood. A man comes by in a boat and says 'get in, get in!' The religous man replies, ' no I have faith in God, he will grant me a miracle. ' Later the water is up to his waist and another boat comes by and the guy tells him to get in again. He responds that he has faith in god and god will give him a miracle. With the water at about chest high, another boat comes to rescue him, but he turns down the offer again cause 'God will grant him a miracle. ' With the water at chin high, a helicopter throws down a ladder and they tell him to get in, mumbling with the water in his mouth, he again turns down the request for help for the faith of God. He arrives at the gates of heaven with broken faith and says to Peter, I thought God would grand me a miracle and I have been let down. ' St. Peter chuckles and responds, 'I don't know what you're c omplaining about, we sent you three boats and a helicopter. '
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Knock Knock Joke - 2
Knock Knock Who's there ! Bhuto ! Bhuto who ? Bhuto-n the other foot !
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Business Joke
An American manufacturer is showing his machine factory to a potential customer from Albania. At noon, when the lunch whistle blows, two thousand men and women immediately stop work and leave the building. 'Your workers, they're escaping!' cries the visitor. 'You've got to stop them. ' 'Don't worry, they'll be back, ' says the American. And indeed, at exactly one o'clock the whistle blows again, and all the workers return from their break. When the tour is over, the manufacturer turns to his guest and says, 'Well, now, which of these machines would you like to order?' 'Forget the machines, ' says the visitor. 'How much do you want for that whistle?'
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Computer Joke
What is an astronaut's favorite key on a computer keyboard? The space bar.
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Ethnic Humor
A Scottish cop was asked how he'd break up a crowd. He answered, 'I'd take up a collection!'
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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