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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of funny toast to the lassies and other funny jokes |
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Men Joke
Q: How does a man show he's planning for the future?A: He buys two cases of beer instead of one.
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Accountant Joke
What's an extroverted accountant? One who looks at your shoes while he's talking to you instead of his own.
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Cow Joke
What are the spots on black-and-white cows? Holstaines
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Ghost Joke
Q: What directions did the ghost give the goblin? A: 'Make a fright turn at the corner. '
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Law Enforcement Joke
On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: 'Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?'To which the farmer replied: 'Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!'
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Humor Joke
A woman realizes her son has not yet gotten out of bed for school. She goes into his bedroom and tells him to get up or he will miss breakfast. 'No, ' the son replies. 'I don't wanna go to school!''You HAVE to go to school, ' the mother scolds. 'No! The kids are mean to me, the teachers don't like me, and the lunches are icky. ''You WILL go to school, young man, ' the mother warns. 'Why? Why do I have to go to school today?' the son asks. The mother is about to lose her patience. 'Because you're the principal, now get out of bed!'
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Random Joke
You're breath's so stinky I don't know whether I should give you a breath mint or toilepaper!
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Free Adult Joke
A blonde was complaining to her friend about constantly being called a dumb blonde. Her friend tells her 'go do something to prove them wrong! Why don't you learn all the state capitals or something?'The blonde thinks this is a great idea, and locks herself up for two weeks studying. The next party she goes to, some guy is making dumb blonde comments to her. She gets all indignant and claims, 'I'm NOT a dumb blonde. In fact, I can name ALL the state capitals!'The guy doesn't believe her, so she dares him to test her. He says 'Okay, what's the Capital of Montana?'The blonde tosses her hair in triumph and says, 'That's easy! It's M!'
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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